Leaked Email from President Dietz Confirms He’s Planning to Not Have Any Snow Days This Year

author-pic at Illinois State University  

A lot of concern has been circling campus about how President Dietz will deal with the upcoming weather conditions. A leaked email from Dietz to ISU staff members suggests that students should not get their hopes up for any snow days this year, as he explains how he will handle large amounts of snowfall.

To Illinois State University Faculty,

Many of you have expressed concern with how extreme weather will be dealt with this semester, and I would strongly advise you all to stick to your normal schedules. DO NOT anticipate any days for university closings or class cancelations, as I will not approve of any snow days this year.

Students need to be in class. That is why they are here, and not their beds. I want every day on your syllabus filled up, and no exceptions. This means that as staff you are no longer allowed to take days off if that will result in a class cancelation. I don’t care if you are running a 150-degree fever, you need to be educating these students. If you really cannot make it to campus to teach your class, Skype in. These students aren’t going to teach themselves to read, so you must be present.

Also, I want to discontinue any freebies from being handed out to students. We are not rich, and these students come here to give us all of their money, not the other way around. If you see anyone on the Quad or anywhere else on campus giving away free things, please take it from them and have it sent to my office, where I will determine if I will keep it for myself or not.

Lastly, I would like to take the time to acknowledge our staff member John Huxford for all the complaints I’ve received on him holding classes later than the let-out time. You should all follow his example, and rather than trying to give these students days off, keep them in the classroom longer. A little extra time learning in the classroom won’t hurt them, but lying in bed watching Netflix and listening to that trashy Justin Bieber song will.

If you have any questions, I would prefer if you don’t ask them.

Sincerely,

Larry Dietz

Speaking of snow days…: