Following last night’s 88-81 upset over Duke, University of South Carolina President Harris Pastides announced the Strom Thurmond Wellness and Fitness Center will be renamed to honor SEC Player of the Year Sindarious Thornwell.
“It’s like, why do we have one of the biggest staples on campus named after a deceased racist anyway?” asked the president, barely containing his tears of joy. “After careful consideration we have decided to chunk that name right out of the books.”
“And don’t think we’ve forgotten Chris Silva!” continued Pastides. “We’re still workshopping that one. Hey, you don’t think Darla Moore would be mad if we renamed it the Chris Silva’s 2nd Half Alley-Oop School of Business, would she?”
Despite protests from several members of the crowd, President Pastides continued to insist Mrs. Moore would be, “totally cool with it”.
The Black Sheep will be following the Gamecocks as they continue to the Sweet 16.
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