UF Sorority Girl Confuses ‘Bracket’ for ‘Racket,’ Attends March Madness Party in a Tennis Skirt

author-pic at University of Florida  

Sunday afternoon freshman student Jamie Jones ventured to a party to watch the Florida Gators take on the South Carolina Gamecocks. As she approached the party she realized she made a grave mistake having worn white sneakers, a black tennis skirt, and a visor to the event.

“All I heard all week was people talking about their rackets, making the perfect racket, and this and that. I just assumed they were talking about tennis,” Jones said.

Like any girl coming to college for the first time, Jones made sure to bring a box of “themed outfits,” for all the themed parties she was planning on attending. She was very excited to finally break out her tennis outfit after wearing her 80’s outfit to 12 different events.

“I hate to sound basic, but I don’t like sports. I don’t care about them, I had no idea what March Madness was until the party,” Jones said. Her G-Big had invited her to the party at Swamp and told her to dress for the theme.

“I went home, opened up my costume trunk, and got to work. My roommate even had a tennis racket she said I could take as a prop! I was so pumped.”

Jones said she’s always a little nervous when going to themed parties because you never know if you’re going to be the only one dressed up. As her Uber pulled up to Swamp, she was relieved to see her friends waiting for her, but felt a sudden rush of fear once she noticed they were all wearing basketball jerseys and knee high socks.

“I honestly had no idea what she was wearing. Like at first I thought she was fucking with us,” said Jones’s Big, Katie Gonzalez. “For a second I really just considered pretending like we didn’t see her, and pulling everyone back inside.”

Jones ran to her group and they quickly huddled around her trying to figure out a way to fix the situation. Short of going in the nude or heading back home to change, she was stuck.

“I remembered that this lame ass bottom tier frat was having a ‘Ball Boy Bros and Tennis Hoes’ party tonight, which I thought was stupid, but it gave Jamie the perfect out,” Gonzalez said.

All the girls agreed to tell people that Jones had pre-gammed at that party and didn’t have time to change before she got to the venue.

Jones said she finally learned what a bracket is just in time for UF to be eliminated from the tournament. 

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