Awkward! The Kid in the UI Hospital is Actually Waving at the Guy Behind You

author-pic at Iowa  

University of Iowa’s newest football tradition is truly spectacular! The touching idea to have every fan turn around after the first quarter of all home games, and wave at the children’s hospital overlooking Kinnick has captured the hearts of local Iowan news outlets, country music stars, and ESPN this fall.

However, since this new tradition’s implementation, many Iowa fans have complained about the incredible awkwardness that results from thinking a kid in the hospital is waving at them, when in actuality, that kid was waving at the person behind them.

Josh Norman, a victim of one of these  awkward interactions, spoke to The Black Sheep about his tragic experience:

“Man, I felt so weird.” said  Norman, a second-year engineering major frequently seen around campus wearing a sweatshirt depicting an anime Herky wrestling down an anime Cyclone. “I was so uncomfortable when I realized the kid was waving at the guy behind me. I ended up doing that cool move where you run your hand through your hair so it doesn’t seem like you’re waving.”

Luckily, no one in the stadium noticed Josh’s social fail, and he was able to enjoy the rest of the game and the bratwurst he had smuggled into Kinnick underneath his sweatshirt.  

“If I’m being honest, I was pretty devastated when I realized the kid wasn’t waving at me and the wave was aimed for some bitch-ass bozo behind me,” Josh continued. “However, this tradition is just so wonderful. I won’t even care if I go the entire season and no kid chooses to wave to me! I’m just here for the Hawks!”

The Black Sheep reached out to senior Max Wilson–the intended recipient of the wave–for his take on the awkward interaction last Saturday: “It was sick. Literally! Right after the kid waved to me I vomited. Too much booze before noon I guess! Despite all the regurgitated cheese and beer dribbling down my torso, I was swept up in the magic and excitement of the wave. I suddenly felt wanted, nay! Loved. Am I the Chosen One?”

The Corporation for Wave Justice, is thrilled to hear that “the wave” at a sports game is now a wholesome, community event and not a disgusting body undulation started by a drunk shirtless man covered in paint.

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