Kareem Abdul-Jabbar joins WMU Basketball Team Just In Time for March Madness

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With college basketball approaching tournament season, and WMU currently sitting with a record of 9-15, extreme measures are needed to pull Western into March Madness contention. With this in mind, WMU Head Basketball coach Steve Hawkins saw fit to extend Kareem Abdul-Jabbar an invitation to walk on the Broncos squad for the remainder of the season.

“You know, Kareem was gonna be in town anyway this March to talk about his book or whatever, I figured hey why the hell not?” Hawkins said. “He’s won championships for the Bucks, the Lakers and UCLA. Why not us?”

Abdul-Jabbar, for his part, was reluctant at first to accept Hawkins’ offer, but circumstances soon changed.

“I was planning on just driving in to Kalamazoo on March 14th to talk with students about my book, Writings on the Wall: Searching for a New Equality Beyond Black and White,” Abdul-Jabbar said. “But as soon as I arrived they took my book away from me! They told me I could have it back ‘when Western makes the Final Four!’ When has that ever happened? I’m going to be here forever!”

President John Dunn sympathized with Abdul-Jabbar’s desire to get his message out, but also expressed a need to end his presidency here at WMU on a high note.

“Trust me, I’m all in favor of incredible individuals coming to our university and giving a message of equality to our incredible students,” Dunn said. “However, at the same time, we haven’t made it to the Sweet Sixteen since 1974, when we lost to Marquette. I think Mr. Abdul-Jabbar can agree that it would be truly amazing if he could lead us to a Final Four berth. And if he can’t this year, I know Western Heights has some beautiful housing with ceilings tall enough for a man of his height.”

Current WMU Basketball player Thomas Davis seemed indifferent to Abdul-Jabbar’s presence on the team.

“Kareem who? Maybe my dad would know him. Is he the old guy who coach keeps making me play one–on-one with? He’s okay, I guess.”

When asked about what he thought of the university, Abdul-Jabbar was begrudgingly complimentary.

“The facilities thus far have been pretty nice I suppose. Hopefully if I’m held captive for another season I can at least be on scholarship.”

Check out Kareem Abdul-Jabbar and rest of the WMU basketball team at University Arena as they make their final push for a spot in the March Madness Tournament.

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