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5 Places on UTK’s Campus to Dump Your Girl Before Valentine’s Day

Valentine’s Day: The only day of the year we wish for relationship. That is, unless you’re already in one and need to get out of it before Valentine’s Day forces you to drop money you don’t have on gifts you haven’t looked for. We sent our relationship reporter in and around UTK’s campus to find places break it off, and trust us — there’s going to be some heartbreak. 

5.)  Fort Sanders Yacht Club: 

Not a bad idea. This is a solid place because it’s relatively small, and you’re probably not going to see a lot of people you know. You can get them a little drunk and let them down easy, but remember: They are right down the strip from Uptown. So be prepared for the consequences, especially on fishbowl Fridays.

4.) Uptown:

Hey, let your fish go where there are a ton more fish ready to take your spot. Cut out the rebound time, and get them with someone ugly right after. Buy her some drinks, get emotional, makeup, all the stuff. Plus, once it’s all done, what’s she going to do? 

3.) Mellow Mushroom: 

Who doesn’t like pizza? Her Twitter doesn’t lack photos of pizza, whether retweeted or posted. She can’t cause a scene if she’s to busy enjoying the wonderful calzone. An even better idea: Bring her on their trivia night! What woman in history was in a great healthy relationship? “Not you babe!” *leaves Mellow*

2.) In a lecture class: 

With so many single seats available in class, there’s no reason why she’d have to sit next to you! She won’t cause a scene (c’mon, it’s class), but better hedge your bets and plan this for Friday. Everyone will forget about you when they hear their friend was dumped on trivia night at Mellow Mushroom and got left the check. You’re in the clear, bro.

1.) Over a text:

Why ruin tradition? Goof goin’, Brad.

Oh hey, listen and subscribe to Talk of Shame:

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