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The Different Types of Snakes in McCombs

McCombs students are often labelled as the most malicious and shady of all UT students, thus earning them the mascot of a snake. But, like snakes, McCombs students vary in how toxic and dangerous they really are. Instead of lumping them together, it’s safer to know which ones you can still safely interact with and which ones you should probably avoid to keep yourself alive.

5.) The Corn Snake:
Like the Corn Snake, these McCombs students can still be considered a friend and probably won’t harm you without serious provocation. They have the general look of a McCombs student, everyone can clearly see they’re a snake, but they haven’t nailed the intimidation skills. They’re the type of snake everyone interacts with because either this snake isn’t strong enough to cause serious damage or they’re reluctant to be as vicious as other McCombs students. Students in this category include freshman during their first semester before they’ve discovered their natural maliciousness, the few naive students who believe they can make a positive difference without losing they’re humanity, and while they aren’t in McCombs, Economics majors.

4.) The Ball Python:
These students have the look, not the skills. Like the Ball Python, they’ve nailed the image you’d expect from a McCombs students. And like the Corn Snake, you can still be friends with a Ball Python and trust them not to turn on you. They’re only fault is that they’re naturally shy, and don’t have the nauseating confidence of a typical McCombs student. But, it’s a fault that can be overcome. These students include freshman, sophomores, and students who haven’t quite mastered their networking skills.

3.) The Hognose Snake:
The first venomous snake on our list, but not venomous enough to harm you. These are the McCombs students you should feel sorry for. They look intimidating and they get easily aggressive when you get them worked up, but ultimately they’re more bark than bite. You can definitely expect some backstabbing from a Hognose, because they’re McCombs students, but ultimately they won’t amount to much after graduation. Basically, they’re the student that can threaten to ruin your reputation and you would just be like, “Okay…” Students in this group include trust fund kids, that one guy even McCombs students dislike, and students who think of The Art of the Deal as the bible of business.

2.) The False Water Cobra:
These people are fake, just like the name suggests. The Regina George of students. These guys are shady af and 10/10 times would not think twice about screwing you over. They aren’t outwardly douchebags, they’re the type of student that would befriend you and make you feel safe and then strike. Like the False Water Cobra, these students aren’t deadly, but it’s unknown how venomous they really are, which makes them more mistrustful. These guys are playing the long game, and will probably strike after graduation. This category includes every McCombs student who was ever nice to you.

1.) The Indian Cobra:
The Indian Cobra isn’t the most venomous snake in the world, but remember, we are only dealing with students. Avoid these people at all costs, as they are as toxic as they come at UT. Much like the hood of the Cobra, the well-tailored suits and feigned friendliness of these students are tell-tale signs of what they are. Not only will these guys bite, they will literally spit venom at you. The only people at the university they actually respect are their professors, the snake charmers. This group includes seniors who are unfortunately likely to succeed in the future, and TAs who are bitter about their lack of success.

Hopefully this list will help every UT student recognize which McCombs student you can talk to and which you should avoid. Interacting with one of these students is risky, but it’s still possible to be in the same social circle as a McCombs student and be safe. However, the most important takeaway is that you can’t fully trust any of them.


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