Most sorority rankings are arbitrary, stupid, and detrimental to the values of sisterhood and Not Going Against the Purity Standards Nationals Imposes. But not this one! This one uses the air-tight, definitive, objective metric of how quickly we remembered them. So, without further ado:
1.) Alpha Delta Chi:
Wow. That’s an unexpected sorority to remember first. But it’s true. ADX, Cal’s Christian sorority, comes in first in our rankings because somebody started talking about it when we began writing this article. That’s the name of the game, though. Good job ADX!
2.) Alpha Phi:
It’s the home of the sunflower, Alpha Phi, coming in at number two in our ranking. Why? Because part of this article was written during a Black Sheep meeting, which was held at Alpha Phi! Being inside the hallowed halls of APhi really jogged our memory.
3.) Delta Delta Delta:
…And in third place, it’s Cal Tri Delt! Tri Delt is objectively the third best sorority at UC Berkeley according to our ranking, because they’re across the street from Alpha Phi, and were directly in our line of sight once our meeting ended! Geographic location is everything, and Tri Delt’s certainly bumped it up in our list.
4.) Alpha Delta Pi:
Just snubbed out of the top three, ADPi ranks fourth in our list. Thank god one of their members texted me “Don’t forget about ADPi in your list! xoxo” just now, otherwise who knows how low they would have been in our ranking.
5.) Pi Beta Phi:
The fact that ADPi ends with the Greek letter that Pi Phi starts with acted as a clever mnemonic that made us remember Pi Phi, so they’re fifth in our ranking! That means Pi Phi is objectively, now and forever, the fifth best sorority at UC Berkeley.
6.) Sigma Kappa:
SK is the SKixth best sorority at Berkeley because of that pun! The ability to pun anything that starts with an S and a vowel sound with this sorority’s letters ensured that we’d remember it sixth.
7.) Sigma Kappa:
SK is also SKeventh! It’s the only sorority at Cal to hold two coveted rankings on our list.
Yeah, we know that’s a frat. We just can’t remember any more sororities off the top of our heads!
Sorry other sororities, that just means you were objectively good enough to make the cut, if you even exist at all!
Do our Vine Power Hour tonight and let us know how it goes!