6 Assholes That Got Tickets to Sonia Sotomayor
Last week, United States Supreme Court Justice Sonia Sotomayor came to Berkeley, and tickets were a hot commodity. While you didn’t get one, a lucky few were given the rare opportunity to see her speak, and they’re total assholes for getting tickets over you. That’s why The Black Sheep has compiled a list of the six shitbags who got a ticket over you.
6.) The Media Studies Major:
What the hell were you doing there? Sotomayor doesn’t make memes so we don’t know what you could have possible gotten from that. Figures that you replied to the email in time, seeing as though you probably weren’t doing anything.
5.) The Person Who Bought One On Facebook:
How did you actually get one on Free and for Sale? This isn’t the fricken Flume concert, this is a Supreme Court Justice. Honestly, the worst person here is the idiot who sold you theirs.
4.) The Republican:
Not to be closed-minded or anything, but haven’t you guys gotten enough lately? Like, can we have this one thing with a liberal judge while you guys go off and destroy the environment? Sheesh.
3.) The ASUC Candidate:
It’s just so exciting you got to see her because you’re just so interested in politics and like after college you totally want to run for office and-and-and…. We get it. You’re running for the ASUC. We’re not voting for you, your platforms are shit.
2.) The Freshman in PoliSci 1:
You don’t even know how a bill becomes a law yet, so you really shouldn’t be the one who gets a ticket. Did you even know who she was before you went?
1.) Guillermo Perez:
We wanted to go, this is bullshit.
However, while it is a travesty most of us didn’t get too see Sotomayor, we’re still probably not gonna read all the emails Dirks sends out.
WATCH: We hit the streets of Chicago’s St. Patty’s Day Parade to see how woke people were.