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A Very Drunken Timeline of the Legendary Davis Trinity

Many Davis students have tried to do the Davis Trinity — three deadly strong drinks at three bars in under 90 minutes — and many have failed. The Black Sheep is here to give a drunken timeline of the Davis Trinity Experience™ and hopefully give some tips along the way.

7:30 P.M.:
I eat dinner, which in this case is a burrito full of spaghetti. Carb-loading is important before drinking this much alcohol, which means that a starchy meal like a spaghetti burrito is usually a good idea. Also none of my dishes were clean.

8 P.M.:

I meet with my friends at the Bar Bernando. We have to go out early because Bistro 33 closes at 9, so we have to finish two drinks before that. The bartender knows immediately that we wanted Wicki Wacky Woos, because why else would three college students be at Bar Bernando at 8 p.m. on a Sunday?

8:20 P.M.:

Wickis are done, and we’re going strong. I’m feeling it a little, but the Wickis are the biggest drink out of all of them I think. The worst thing is just how much liquid it is. I’m going to have to pee something awful at the end of this.

8:30 P.M.:

We make our way to Bistro 33. After being directed to the super secret back bar in the old City Hall (because it was a Sunday, so they weren’t fully staffed), we order drinks from the bartender. He mixes us the old version of the Devastator that tastes slightly less like ass. Don’t get me wrong, it’s still pretty bad.

8:50 P.M.:

I try to order a glass of water from the bartender to deal with the upcoming hangover. He gives it to me, but mentions that there’s cold, hard water in my drink. Smartass. I’m really beginning to feel it now, but I don’t think most of the drink has hit me. We’re done here with ten minutes to spare.

9 P.M.:

I usually hate Red 88 because it’s small and crowded and loud and otherwise unpleasant, but right now it seems better than usual. Maybe it’s because it’s 9 on a Sunday night, or maybe it’s because I’m pretty drunk by this point. The three of us order FMLs all around.

9:15 P.M.:

We’re done. I’m drunk, and I’ve got a massive case of the drunchies that only curly fries can solve. We stop at Jack in the Box for some and then head home.

It’s not even 10 yet, and we’re all ready to go to sleep. But that’s about as easy as it gets doing the Davis Trinity.

 

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