On a rainy day of winter quarter, broke college student Francesca Arias skipped her ethnic studies lecture to head to Coffee Bean with friend Jenn Mason. Minutes later she realized that the woman sitting inside and across from where she was seated was the professor of said lecture.
“I’ve never seen her make a scene like that before,” Jenn said of Francesca, who, as soon as she realized she was sitting across from her professor, proceeded to choke on the chocolate muffin she’d been eating. “She swung her arms all around, tried to slam her fists against her chest to try to cough it up and when that didn’t work, she started to slam her hands on the table like a kid throwing a tantrum.”
“I thought I was going to die,” Francesca commented. “Jenn tried making me drink some of her tea to try and wash down the muffin, but when I took a gulp of it, it scalded my tongue and I ended up dribbling the hot drink down my neck and shirt.”
The professor at fault for causing Francesca to get into such a panic noticed the choking student and immediately ran to help her, unaware of how the student freaked out more at the sight of her nearing than choking to death.
“She gave me a hard hit on the back and I just, like, threw up the muffin,” Francesca said.
“Yeah, and even after all that, she still finished eating the rest of it,” Jenn added.
The professor did not recognize the student, only asked Francesca if she was alright and then went to sit across from the two students, deciding that bonding moment called for some conversation.
“Several people came over to ask if I was okay,” Francesca said. “But I was scared that the professor would recognize me, so I pretty much seemed like a bitch when I waved them off that I was fine.”
The professor engaged them in small talk, eventually confessing to the two that she procrastinated on an important essay she needed to submit and decided she would cancel her class that afternoon to spend it at the campus Coffee Bean and finish the paper.
Francesca eventually told the professor that she was one of her students, but the woman didn’t suspect she’d been skipping lecture, only assumed Francesca had gotten the email about the canceled lecture and happened to settle on spending the afternoon at Coffee Bean.
“She called me ‘choke-a-lot muffin’,” she sighed. “But when she does, I get the last laugh when I call her ‘procrastinator’.”
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