In a shocking press statement released yesterday afternoon by UConn spokesperson Stephanie Reitz, it was announced that the UConn Buy or Sell page has been sold to popular dating website, Tinder. The Black Sheep immediately set out to uncover the details of this sudden change in ownership.
Our sources have cited a popular post on the Buy or Sell page as catalyst for the final sale of the page to Tinder. In the post, an altruistic Husky had one goal: to find her roommate a boyfriend. An overwhelming amount of people responded after the request was posted, and Tinder representatives jumped at the opportunity.
“With the Buy or Sell page, we hope to restore young people’s faith in ‘fate’ and ‘blind dates’ in a way that no app could ever hope to do,” said Creative Director of Development and Outreach at Tinder, Nora Ephron, “And the best part is: we don’t even have to lift a finger. GET IT? Like swiping. Yeah, you get it.”
Tinder uses Facebook to create user profiles; so all personal information is already available on Buy or Sell for individuals to stalk one another on their matchmaking quests, but Buy or Sell offers the unique advantage of having Facebook users just randomly tagging their single friends without any context whatsoever.
The UConn community has expressed both surprise and concern at the sudden sale of the page to Tinder. “I’m still trying to forget about my awful semi-experiences with UConn frat guys. I use Buy & Sell to pawn off my broken furniture on unsuspecting students, NOT get drunk messages from guys who religiously get drunk at 11 a.m. at Teds,” said UConn alum, Lorelai Macklemore.
Others are happy with the change, saying that this will make people more accountable on the dating scene. “I hate when I match with a guy, only to be flat out ignored for days. Like don’t swipe me if you’re not interested, dude,” said one Tinder user who choose to remain anonymous. “If a guy likes my post on Buy or Sell, I won’t hesitate to tag his unresponsive ass, and maybe his girlfriend, too.”
As the first ever deal made between a university and Tinder, UConn is seeking feedback from any and all frequent Buy or Sell users. University spokesperson Stephanie Reitz urges students to contact SMM Willie Stroker at firstname.lastname@example.org with any concerns, and to send in their middle school photos to be featured on the page starting next week.
Shacking: just a one night stand? Or what does that word actually mean?