Sure, Richmond doesn’t always seem like the sexiest place on earth, but there’s a few things about VCU’s campus that make life here just a little steamier (it’s not the sewers). It’s the little things on campus that can really make a VCU student hot and heavy, aka the nonsexual things that really turn you on at VCU:
7.) Class being cancelled due to a power outage:
There’s always a silver lining to VCU not having its shit together, and sometimes that silver lining is your midterm being postponed. That blackboard notification that reads, “Class today will be cancelled because Hibbs Hall is stuck in the dark again” can really get your motor running.
6.) Getting all the way from Christians to your house without watching a stranger vomit:
It doesn’t happen everyday or every week, but once in a blue moon, VCU students are blessed with not having to watch some variation of bodily fluids evacuating the body of someone they’ve never met on West Grace Street. That beautiful change of scenery really is something spicy.
5.) When Shafer doesn’t give you immediate food poisoning:
While finding the occasional screw in your mashed potatoes is something to be shrugged off at this point in the game (and the bubble guts conversation are sure to be had), there is a gleaming beacon of light every so often. Having a meal that tastes marginally better than the public school lunch that doesn’t send you running out of your next class to the nearest bathroom is something special.
4.) Finding the one good study spot in Cabell:
It could take days, it could take months, or it could even take years. Finding a secluded area of Cabell that is as comfortable as it is conducive to some semblance of learning is no easy feat to accomplish. When you finally do find that beautiful curvaceous chair near both a window and an outlet, all that’s left to do is to hear Paris Hilton’s echo in the recesses of your mind as you acknowledge, “That’s hot.”
3.) Actually remembering to bring a GradeIT sheet to class:
There’s nothing worse than standing at a Barnes and Noble with only five minutes left to get to an exam in Harris Hall. Sleeping tight knowing you won’t be heavily sweating with a collective of other procrastinators for once in your life is something that you can leave you heavily sweating on your own. So this is what it means when people say their “in heat”…
2.) Finding out the party you missed was a kickback at best:
Having to go home early because you have an 8 a.m. the next day isn’t even remotely hot, but you know what is? When you find out you didn’t miss out on a single thing. Your FOMO is completely erased as your friends describe a girl with a pixie cut and a ukulele taking centerstage at this supposed party you didn’t go to. “Ooh, tell me more,” you say, hearing now that someone in overalls apparently decided to make everyone talk about gender politics
1.) Successfully navigating through the Compass without being given a pamphlet:
It gets dicier and dicier by the minute, and the possibility of getting caught not actually having music playing in your headphones only makes it hotter. The Compass is regularly teeming with a variety of people trying to hand you papers that will inevitably end up in the garbage or littering the streets. Being able to get to where you need to go without talking to a single one is the rush you need to get through your next class.
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