VCU’s Unofficial Welcome Week Drinking Game
It’s the fall semester, summer is coming to its tragic end, and Welcome Week is in full force at VCU. If you’re not snatching up tote bags of free things from your friendly neighborhood conglomerate, it’s a good time to keep your eyes peeled and your blood alcohol content downright alarming, as we unveil a drinking game for this year’s Welcome Week. Take a shot every time you spot one of the following:
1.) Small Flock of Freshmen Who Still Have Dreams:
It’s the start of the rest of their lives! Wide eyes, big backpacks, and IG posts of their new roommates they’re all soon to grow to hate are out in full force this week. Take one.
2.) Condescending Comment From a Transfer Student Who is “Over It”:
He’s got long hair and loves the word “reductive.” He used to go to a liberal arts school identical to this one on the other side of the country, and he’s not afraid to let everyone know he has one semester of college experience. Despite being “Over It,” he is at every single Welcome Week event. Shot.
3.) A New Friend Group Eating at Shafer, Blissfully Unaware of What the Future Holds:
The best group of friends that met on Monday that are entirely unaware that three of them are going to turn against everyone else after someone keeps subtweeting them about their missing granola bars. We all know you ate them, Dana. Shots, shots, shots.
4.) Someone Who is Really Overestimating How Organized They Will Be This Semester:
It doesn’t matter how many binder clips and specialized color-coded dividers you bought before you started classes, Cynthia. You’re gonna have two pens you found on the floor and a single piece of notebook paper one week in just like the rest of us. Bonus shot: take a drink if you steal Cynthia’s color-coded dividers.
5.) Uncomfortable Icebreakers:
Everyone is going in a circle and telling everyone their name, pronouns, and something interesting about themselves. Everyone is collectively ignoring the girl who’s interesting facts about herself are blatant lies. Take a shot to numb the pain.
6.) A Kid Buying His First Pack Of Cigarettes:
There’s so many choices! Now that Jake’s 18 and away from his parents for the first time, you’ll see this kiddo staring up at a whole mess of brands, wide-eyed and scrambling to pick. Regardless, he’s just really excited to post selfies with a cig behind his ear. Bonus shot: He picks Newport’s because “Oh, my aunt lives in Newport News.”
7) “How Much Could Textbooks Possibly Be Anyway?”:
Should you feel sorry for them or envy their absolute naivety? You should take a shot, and invite them to take one with you.
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