Each year thousands of Hokies face the horrors of exam week. Gallons of coffee is consumed, average bedtimes become 3:30 a.m., and headaches from staring at a computer screen can put a strain on the average Hokie. Let’s face it, you’d rather go to UVA and lose football games than take exams. However, we have some exams we think you’d ace:
5.) Lane Seating Systems 4000:
Climbing six stories of stairs, standing for three hours and calculating the perfect angle to watch the game will be the main focus of this final. Part of the exam will feature you climbing over drunk students, sitting with your parents in west stands, and of course urinating in Lane’s famously gross bathrooms.
4.) 2-Factor Authentication 3154:
Everyone would pass an exam if they could use their phone, right? Well this exam lets you do just that. Not only can you get pissed off trying to login to canvas, but when you do it’s an instant pass. Easy A.
3.) TOTS Drinking 1000:
Beer, shot or rail? Each portion of this exam requires you to complete some sort of drinking task. Multiple-choice shots, short answer about mixed drinks and keg stand as your essay. Bonus: climb on the table and get a picture without falling after.
2.) Intro to Gobbling 1205:
Every Hokie needs to take this class, nonnegotiable. Learning the origins and history of the gobble are vital to be a Hokie, how else are you going to annoy other people at sporting venues? The proper gobbling technique is also important. Remember to study stance, hand placement and volume, but don’t worry it s only 60 questions and it’s multiple choice. Not only can you add another A to balance out the shame on your report card, but you can also practice at D2 whenever you want.
1.) Advanced Procrastinating (at Duckpond) 4000:
If you need a GPA booster then Advanced Procrastinating is exactly what you need. Not only do you get to blow off work, but they encourage it. You also get to take in the majestic scenery, sit back, and relax. On the syllabus the professor put the exam time as “we will figure it out later.” You’ll love it and so will Jay and Bey.
Remember, even if you bomb every other exam, we have faith you could easily pass these ones! Happy studying.