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6 Things You Wish You Could Successfully Sneak into Lane Stadium


The Duke game is sneaking up on us and it’s about to get more intense than that time you took your Chem final on thirty seconds of sleep. The fact that it’s a night game gives it the edge and excitement that Hokies are more than capable of dishing out. Because of this, you might be thinking of all of the things you wish Tech would let you bring into Lane Stadium if it weren’t for the restrictions…


6.) Your grandma’s blanket:
You know that one blanket that your Grandma made with so much love that you can’t watch your favorite tv shows without it? To be able to watch a live football game with it is probably your heart’s biggest desire (outside of having photographic evidence of yourself chillin’ on the rooftop of Burruss). But sacrificing Granny’s love is just the price you gotta pay sometimes as a Hokie. It’s a hard-knock life.


5.) Night-vision glasses:
Because it’s a 7 p.m. game, you really don’t want to be dealing with the stress of trying to find your car after it’s over. In the dark. With stumbling drunks to your left and right. And that’s why night-vision glasses could be your one true savior, if only they could accompany you.


4.) Your OWN turkey leg:
You can’t deny that you haven’t dreamt about how good those concession stand turkey legs look when you look around the crowd at games. If only you had money growing out of your butt-crack to afford them; it’s too bad you have the unnecessary costs of adulthood, like rent. In the meantime, you can only hope that shoving a pre-bought turkey leg under your shirt before entering the stadium will work.


3.) Your laptop:
Because you definitely still have assignments due at midnight that you’ve been neglecting for weeks and every ounce of your body is regretting the major case of procrastination that’s been coursing through your veins. It’s unfortunate that you can’t yank out your laptop during half time to finish them up. Rest In Peace GPA.


2.) A La-Z-Boy recliner:
Sometimes the bleachers are far too uncomfortable, they’ll definitely be too cold, and if you’re being real with yourself, someone else is probably sitting in your spot anyway. The proper way to enjoy a football game should really be from the comfort of your favorite recliner. It’s a shame to leave it behind.


1.) Yourself:
Soooo you never bought season tickets, you didn’t win the lottery, and everyone plus their mother is going to this game that you know of. And you’re desperate. Truthfully, if you can successfully sneak yourself in, you deserve to be there because of how impossible it is. But unless you’re a wizard, you’re stuck with trying to buy a ticket last minute off of a stubborn freshman that won’t lower the price for anyone.


You shouldn’t try to literally sneak any of these things inside of the stadium unless you want to be tackled by security guards before getting kicked out. You’d be missing one hell of a game and you really don’t want to be that loser that misses jumping to “Enter Sandman.” At the very least, you can relax knowing that everyone else is daydreaming about the possibilities alongside you.



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