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7 Practiced Responses for Your SPOT Survey Answers

 We can almost smell the end of the semester, even though the weather’s taken twelve years to get above 60 degrees. With this time of year comes the wave of stress with finals, an extreme lack of motivation, and the bombardment of SPOT Survey notifications. To help you with this, we came up with some automatic responses you can use to get these surveys over with ASAP:

7.) For the perfect professor:
“This professor was an actual angel sent from the heavens. They were the Dumbledore to my Harry, except without the whole fighting-Voldemort-destroying-all-of-his-Horcruxes-in-order-to-save-both-the-wizarding-world-and-the-Muggle-world thing. They were the wind beneath my wings, the kind of wise and influential professor you’d see on a sitcom, my very own Mr. Feeny. My heart and soul. I only wish I had more time to spend in the presence of such a saint.”

6.) For the professor everyone hates:
“You’ve probably heard this from at least a million other students, so my bad if this is repetitive. And I know this is going to sound harsh but like…how bad would it be if you just got this professor fired? I know that’s mean, but so is giving me a C- on a paper that I didn’t even write at 2 a.m. for once. They should be grateful I even MLA formatted it. I should’ve dropped their class when I had the chance, and now I regret it more than that time I ate DX sushi on a dare freshman year.”

5.) For the professor who can’t teach:
“I’ve been to every class, I’ve seated myself within the first few rows of the lecture hall, and I always have a cup of coffee with me so I can pay attention. And nothing works. I take notes, I don’t browse Facebook during class, and yet I don’t get anything out of it because this professor can’t teach to save their life. And to think, I could’ve been taking Buzzfeed quizzes telling me what kind of pasta I am based off of who my favorite Kardashians are this whole time.”

4.) For the hot professor:
“They’re one of the most gorgeous human beings I’ve ever laid eyes upon. They’re like if a genie gave a Tech student three wishes and they used all of them in attempts to create this Magic Mike model. I’m having one of those moments where I’m just really glad I chose to go Virginia Tech and that I took this course with this professor at this particular time. Hot damn. God bless.”

3.) For the easy-grading professor:
“This professor’s course was such a delight and I’m totally not just saying that because it was an easy A. In fact, I learned quite a bit about [insert topic here]. I’m currently hoping I can have many, many, many more classes with this wonderful academic inspiration. Please give them a raise or a cookie or a personalized parking spot. Xoxo.”

2.) For the professor with stories:
“I definitely learned a lot during this class…about the professor, that is. They spent more time talking about themselves and their family, including their child who I honestly couldn’t care less about. Your kids are great, sir, but what do they have to do with business law? My tuition-paying wallet is more furious than it was when Tech raised our tuition a hot two seconds after Giving Day.”

1.) For every Math Empo “professor”:
“I couldn’t tell you what this professor looks like even if they were the only human in a room filled with robots. So glad my tuition is going towards the salary of this computer-teacher.”

Use these answers for all of your SPOT Survey needs and the last day of the semester will come quicker than you know it. It’s just one last thing you have to worry about before hitting the beach outside of trying to get your summer bod in shape while still eating Qdoba every day.

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