To the shock and horror of many Hokies, Virginia Tech has implemented a new clear bag policy for all home football games. It will go into strict effect on October 20 for the Thursday night Miami game. All bags entering the stadium must be clear plastic, vinyl, or PVC, and cannot exceed the size limitations. Of course, a stylish version of these bags and clutches are now available at the University Book Store, if a gallon sized Ziploc doesn’t go well with your outfit. However, surprisingly, this new rule has sparked a new trend in the fashion world, ranging from purses to jackets to Yeezy’s new fall line.
“When we decided to regulate the type of bag guests can bring inside Lane Stadium, we were doing so for health and safety reasons. We had no idea that our new rule would create such a buzz in the fashion world and among celebrities, like Kim and Kanye. But hey, we don’t mind taking the credit,” a Virginia Tech Official said.
The clear plastic fashion statement is all the rage right now. During the 1960s, there was a great enthusiasm for plastic garments. Flash-forward to 2016, plastic is everywhere again, thanks to us. The new bags combine elements of style with safety to help students look cute and to get through the security line fast enough to make Enter Sandman.
“It’s just another way Virginia Tech invents the future. We set the standard for so many things like research, dining hall food, and overall happiness of students. Why wouldn’t we be front-runners for fashion, too?” said fashion marketing student Allison Harrison.
However, besides the fashion revival, the main hope for this new policy is that it will keep students safe… from bringing alcohol inside the stadium.
“We are trying to cut down on alcohol related injury and conflict. These clear bags do wonders for the overall safety of our students and we are glad they are being so receptive to them,” Virginia Tech Security Officer said.
While the safety aspect of the bags is the reason why they were instituted, some students plan on only using them because they’re cute, and because they like a good challenge.
“The possibilities are endless. Tampon tube shots and sun-screen bottles emptied and filled with rum, man. I can’t wait to go to my first game with my clear plastic bag and feel like a total badass for getting inside,” Harrison added.
Make sure to head to Gucci Kroger and grab a pack of gallon sized Ziplocs, because starting on October 20, this policy will be taking strict effect. If you’re feeling particularly stylish, check out the book stores selection of plastic and vinyl bags, plus clutches. What’s a few more bucks? Especially when it benefits our safety.
For those about to rush, we salute you: