It’s that magical time of year in Kalamazoo when the forecast includes scattered snowfall, police on horseback, and vomit raining down from the upper levels of your frat of choice. Yes, St. Patrick’s Day has arrived and Broncos of all ages are eager to get in on the festivities. The Black Sheep has organized a drinking game befitting of the day, so gather your friends, your drinking paraphernalia, and of course all the booze you can get your hands on. Cheers!
Take a shot when:
– You run into anybody you’ve had a class with. (Taking a shot together is preferred.)
– You spot anybody wearing a MSU shirt as their green for the day.
– You see a DSK car.
– You talk to anyone who says they live in the Valleys.
– Somebody brings up the hockey team. Once you swallow, shout “he shoots, he scores!”
Pour one out when:
– Anybody says “Row the Boat.”
– Anybody mentions President Dunn.
– You see anybody wearing Cotton Bowl gear.
Shotgun or chug a beer when:
– You see a kid’s fake ID get denied.
– You see somebody with a “Lawson Lunatics” shirt on.
– You meet somebody from K College. (You gotta show them how it’s done.)
– Someone brags about their Irish heritage.
Bong a beer when:
– You hear, see, or think the words “Fight on, fight on.” Be sure to shout out “for Western!” right before you put the hose in your mouth.
– You run into somebody who lived with or around you during your first year on campus. Follow this up by reminiscing about how many times you fucked with their stuff when they weren’t around.
– You find that you’ve lost one of your friends during the walk from The Grotto to The Library (or vice versa.)
Take a good, long pull of you liquor of choice when:
– Anybody mentions P.J. Fleck. The more you drink, the easier it is to forget.
– Somebody around you returns from purchasing something green to wear for the day. (Take two pulls if they bought it from The Den.)
– You get invited to a party in Fratville.
– You find your way on campus for some godforsaken reason.
– You encounter Buster the Bronco in any way, shape, or form.
– Somebody around you mentions their March Madness bracket.
St. Patrick’s Day is the one day of the year where everybody is proud to get as drunk as humanly possible, so make the most of it! Drink as much green beer as you possibly can, and make your school and your city proud.
WATCH: For some, spring break is about partying on the beach. For others, it’s about wallowing in despair: