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6 Things That WMU Freshmen Will Never Ever Know

Every year, the new crop of baby Broncos seem more like babies. While upperclassmen start to feel older than McCracken Hall, the freshman are bewildered by the new experience. However, WMU has not always been the easy living that it is now. Older Broncos have suffered like the freshies will never know, so The Black Sheep is here to remind you of what this new class of Broncos is missing out on.

6.) Questionable Cafeteria Food:
Back in the day, it seemed like most of the cafeterias didn’t put in all that much effort. If you wanted quality, you had to hike across campus all the way to Bistro. The Valley cafeterias before the extravagant Valley Dining Center went up were a disgrace, so while freshman enjoy 5-star meals, upperclassmen remember being under the constant threat of getting food poisoning.

5.) Laughable Sports Teams:
WMU’s football team has been hot news all over the country for the last year. A 12-0 season, top 5 NFL draft pick, superstar players, and a legendary coach is what Western sports is now known for, but things were not always this way. When we first rowed the boat, we rowed it to a 1-11 season, with a regularly empty stadium. So, sing the fight song with some pride, you lucky freshmen.

4.) Being Shoved Into the Valleys:
Before the new, palace-like dorms went up a year ago, almost every freshman was packed into Valley 1, 2, and 3 like young, alcoholic rats. It was like a trashy hotel filled with 19-year-olds, but it was still beautiful. Nowadays, the Valleys are occupied only by those whose parents can’t afford a killer dorm and life of luxury for their young alcoholic.

3.) Dope Facilities:
In the ancient time of the early 2010s, campus wasn’t filled with new buildings, fancy lecture halls, and million-dollar computer labs. It was filled with Dunbar-esque buildings with no A/C and desks that look like they came from your mom’s middle school. Every time you walk through Sangren Hall, know that it was built with the tuition of those who suffered for you.

2.) Awesome Stuff by Campus:
As you stuff your face with Two Fellas, Domino’s, Nicks, and Hot Slice, or chug drinks from The Old Goat and Fifth Ave, you probably don’t stop to think about how lucky you are. All of these perfect drunk Bronco feeding troughs have only been around for a couple years, so instead of a dank pizza place, upperclassmen used to wait in line for late night dorm cafeteria take out.

1.) “Row the Boat”:
As stupid as it sounded, the phrase “Row the Boat” ended up winning the heart of every Bronco out there. Just like it’s creator, the killer catchphrase left the school as fast as oars could carry it and is now just a source of pain for everyone who once chanted it with pride..

So if you’re an upperclassmen who thinks that the all the freshmen Broncos have it way too easy, you’re totally right. The new Western class of 2021 will never know the suffering that the OGs went through to get here, so give ‘em hell and don’t forget about the good ol’ days.

 

Nostalgic? Our podcast might help fix that. 

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