Cordelia Malraux

Illinois

UIUC Anthropology Student Tells Tinder Date, ‘If You Use A Cultural Lens, My Dick Is, In Fact, Quite Large’

Liberal arts majors took another loss last Saturday, as UIUC student Kevin Durst flubbed his third...

Illinois

Sorority Girl Claims To Be Tinder Brand Ambassador On Resume, Is Actually Just Kind Of A Hoe

UIUC senior and sister of Chi Alpha Nu, Traci McFadden, was looking to give her resume...

Illinois

Embarrassing: High School Basketball Star Got Dunked On In His KIN109 Class

UIUC sophomore and team captain of Panthers Varsity Basketball team of 2016-2017, Nick Johnson, made an...

Illinois

Probably Unnecessary: The BIF Adds Valet Parking To Add To Other Pointless Amenities No One Asked For

This past year has come with many new features for UIUC Business Instructional Facility, such as...

Illinois

Super Badass Freshman Reveals To ACE-IT Facilitator That He Doesn’t Count His Shots

UIUC freshman and self-proclaimed heavyweight drinker, Tucker Morgan, just completed his ACE-IT Workshop, surrounded by freakin’...

Illinois

‘No, It’s, Like, Actually Pretty Hard,’ And 10 Other Lies To Tell Your Friends About Your Advertising Major

At a school like UIUC, known for its prestigious engineering program and top-rated business facilities, sometimes...

Illinois

How to Establish To Your Lecture Class That You Can Type The Most Words Per Minute

Not like you peaked in middle school or anything, but you can never let yourself, or...

Illinois

6 Ways You Attempted To Smoke At Your Parents’ House This Summer Without Getting Caught

Whether you and your hometown friends huddled up in a circle in your basement (since you’re...

Illinois

Bartender of the Week: Olivia from KAM’S

Name: Olivia Harmon Instagram Handle: @livvih Bar: KAM’S Relationship Status: Single Major: Anthropology Favorite Drink: Leinenkugel...

Illinois

Op-Ed: Actually I’m Happy to Graduate and Return to Work at the Naperville Public Pool, It’s A Good Thing

In just a mere few days, I will finally be receiving my bachelor’s degree in communications,...