Vince Coleman

Illinois

Frat Guy With Guitar In Room Laments Lack Of Opportunity To Showcase 15 Years Of Classical Training

A guitar in the corner of a frat boy’s bedroom usually serves little purpose beyond nonfunctional...

Illinois

Tragic: Student Fails To Escape From Murderer While Waiting For Green And Wright Crosswalk To Change

At 4:32 this morning the body of UIUC student, Jonathan Knight, was discovered on the southeast...

Illinois

Oops: Chancellor Bobby Jones Walks Into Union Movie Night The Exact Moment A Sex Scene Comes On

Unfortunately for the straight-edge losers at last weekend’s movie night showing, Chancellor Bobby Jones was doing...

Illinois

Heartbreaking: Nobody Listens When Girl Tries To Quiet Down Party For Phone Call From Mom

As high school parties, countless teen movies, and that one Vine with that guy who gets...

Illinois

Inspired by Vet Med’s Cow, Biology Department Cuts Hole In TA for Demonstration Purposes

For years, the Vet Med at UIUC has been using a fistulated cow, Brooke, to give...

Illinois

5 Gay Awkward Moments Today’s Freshmen Will Never Experience At C Street

Few stories are more tragic than the closing of Chester Street Bar, the acclaimed downtown Champaign...

Illinois

Top 6 Places to Vomit Around Campus Before You Leave Forever

Unless you’re one of the suckers that gets roped into “continuing your education” by going to...

Illinois

8 Ways to Keep Your Moribund Laptop Alive During Group Meetings

When your laptop battery lasts less than an hour unplugged, it might be time to consider...

Illinois

Alma is Dead: What Stands in Place of the Original Alma is a Pathetic Forgery

Alma is the beloved symbol for everything this university represents, and, in recent years, the lack...

Illinois

9 Ways A UIUC Engineering Degree Helps You Be Better In Bed

Stereotypically that all engineers are awkward and unsociable, but little did you know that your education...