Madeline Petrovich

Notre Dame

After 87 Years Notre Dame Stadium Celebrates One Billion Sunburnt Necks!

Following the third consecutive home September football game, Notre Dame Stadium is proud to announce that...

Notre Dame

Eager New Dillon RA Unaware That Someone Just Pooped In The Middle Of The Hallway

After days of lofting beds and carrying suitcases into bright-eyed freshman’s rooms, Dillon Hall RA, Trevor...

Notre Dame

Senior at Newfs Whispers ‘You Know, I’m Not Really Happy at All’ to His Own Drink

Joseph Romano was enjoying a night out last Friday night at the one and only Newfs...

Notre Dame

Legends Excitedly Expecting Massive Hip Hop Night Attendance with Feve’s Closing

After Michiana’s hottest night club closed its doors last Thursday, Michiana’s SECOND hottest nightclub is expecting...

Notre Dame

Student Nails 95 Theses to the Basilica Door

On Wednesday, multiple sticky notes were found taped to the doors of the Notre Dame Basilica,...

Notre Dame

South Dining Hall is Purposely Tanking to get Students to Spend More Money at the Duncan Student Center

As South Dining Hall’s quality (and quantity) of food rapidly declines, students and faculty alike are...

Notre Dame

Senior Finally Discovers Women’s Basketball Team in Wake of National Championship

Notre Dame senior Patrick O’Brien was devastated after hearing of star basketball player Bonzie Colson’s season-ending...

Notre Dame

How to: Convince Your Parents You Still Go to Mass This Easter Season

As Lent wraps up and Easter approaches, many students return home during the extended break to...

Notre Dame

ND F*** IT FRIDAY: NOTRE DAME MAJOR AS VINES

Hello and Welcome to The Black Sheep’s Fuck It Friday: A day where we phone it...

Notre Dame

Notre Dame Students Horrified Over Martin’s Use of Chiller Font

Martin’s, the beloved grocery store that supplies students with endless Hot Pockets and Barefoot Pink Moscato,...