Welcome to Syllabus Week round 2, bitches! Let the pretend schoolwork and assignment line-ups begin. Syllabus Week is basically like any other week of college as far as beverages consumed are concerned, except during this special time there’s no work to feel guilty about neglecting. So why not have a little more fun during these happy happy times and play our Syllabus Drinking Game with a few of your closest delinquent friends?
What You’ll Need:
Liquor of your choice (aka Burnett’s), mixers, your syllabi, friends and their syllabi, a gut of steel, Christian’s Pizza when that gut of steel fails you, and a late class the following morning.
Number of Players:
At least you. Players can vary in quantity from your roommate to your entire discussion section, this depends on how drunk you’d like to be and if you’re the kind of person that has friends. Loners need not feel bad; getting drunk alone is only a “problem” once you graduate.
Level of Intoxication:
Depending on where your class falls on the bullshit spectrum, you will either be heavily buzzed or completely hammered. Truly, this was determined by your professor before you played the game, so there’s always someone else to blame.
How to Play:
-Gather all players and sit in a circle or, really, any shape. This doesn’t actually matter; it’s an archaic game stipulation.
-Mix your dranks.
-The player with the syllabus from the lowest level class begins (sorry first years) to read their syllabus aloud. This player is called the pupil.
-If the pupil had trouble pronouncing their professor’s name, the pupil takes a shot. If the pupil continues to mispronounce the name and has to keep taking shots, the pupil can be tapped out by a brown-noser to begin reading their syllabus.
-Every time the pupil reads the word “purpose,” “goal,” or “objective,” all players take a sip of their drink.
-If laptops are not allowed in the class, the pupil chooses a player to take a shot and speak like a caveman until the next mention of technology (Collab counts as technology, somehow).
-All players sip every time an assigned reading exceeds 15 pages; take two sips for an assigned chapter.
-All players cheers and round-robin say what they’re thankful for when the pupil says “Reading Day.”
-Once the syllabus has been read in its entirety, the person with the next lowest level class becomes the pupil and the round continues.
-The key to any good homemade drinking game is adding your own rules! Make the game your own by throwing in a naked lap for midterm papers or make the pupil shotgun a beer if someone in the room can figure out your professor’s political views with at least 80% confidence. Mix it up, pour it up, just don’t throw up. No one likes a puker.
The Game Ends When:
Someone pukes. All games end when someone pukes. If no one throws up, the game ends when there are no more syllabi or someone gets offended.