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The 4 Stages of Going Out at Clemson

 

Here at Clemson, being all in means going all out in whatever we do—and that means play as well as work. Come Thirsty Thursday, downtown fills with everyone from seniors drinking away their real life problems to freshman trying out their first fake, and the madness doesn’t stop till Sunday. Our nights usually consist of a blur of bars and late night Cook Out runs, often culminating with Monday morning tears over the emptiness of our wallets. Here are the stages of going out at as a Clemson Tiger:

 

The Pre-Game: 

Some call it the best part of the night, but it’s only the beginning. With a strip of bars on both sides of downtown Clemson, all within walking distance, pre-gaming can last for hours. Veterans of the pre-game know to hit up the right side of the street first, and hence avoid the ridiculously long light at the intersection. Stop by all the classics, like Tiger Town Tavern and 356. You can even make a detour to Backstreet’s. Come midnight, you’ll have come to the end of the street and be ready to grab some conveniently located Chipotle or Moe’s—a debate we won’t enter into here—and hit up favorites like TD’s and Loose Change on the way back.

 

Go-Time: 

It’s the moment we’ve all been drinking for: the party. Some may have been trapped on the karaoke floor at TD’s, but if you did there’s no telling where the night will take you. A Clemson might be at a relatively close frat house, or if you’re lucky it might be a swanky event at The Cottages. If you’re headed off campus, be sure to have a convenient acquaintance-with-a-pickup truck standing by for the ride home. Just don’t wait for your lost friends or you’ll miss your ride; fortunately, riding drunk in the bed of a pickup truck will turn strangers into life-long friends.

 

The After Party:

Whether you collapse on the floor of the party or make it back home, there are always after parties. Crack open the liquor that’s been chilling above your fridge: this is what it’s meant for. Whether or not you knew your after party companions at the night’s beginning, you’re sure to discover way more than you ever thought necessary. If you’re in a place of residence, you’ll likely be treated to some of the most amazing Easy Mac, pancakes or frozen pizza you’ve ever had. If you venture back into the night, be prepared for random creepy guys, exuberant make out sessions in the President’s Walk, and casualties fallen from the backs of pickup trucks. The after party is where shit gets real: beware of booty calls and regrettable drunken texts. 

 

The Aftermath:

Now is the part of the night when your bed’s siren song becomes irresistible. It will take great effort and perseverance to brave Clemson’s numerous hills, stairs and other inconsiderate obstacles, but it’ll be worth it. If you’re lucky, you’ll awake the next morning in all the same clothes and leftovers in the fridge.

 

From the pre-game to the aftermath, we hope all Tigers practice safe drinking. Every dollar, bad decision, and regrettable make out made a good night that you most likely won’t remember until seeing that kid you hooked up with on campus the following Monday.

 

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