Every weekend of college brings with it a unique array of possibilities. The drinks you choose and the places you go are determining factors for the amount of fun you have on a given weekend, but just as important are the people you meet and interact with in your most lucid states of mind. To prepare you for next weekend, here is a list of individuals you are definitely going to see:
That Kid With Whom You Graduated High School Whose Name Escapes You:
There’s always that one kid who has a face that screams “we went to school together for four years!” What is the reason behind this certain uncertainty? The reason is that you did, in fact, go to school with this person for four years. The problem is you’re just too full of Busch Lights to remember or care about their name. Make awkward eye contact and smile. It’s the least you can do.
The Boy Or Girl You’ve Been Crushing On In Your Econ Class:
Getting drunker than you intended is never a good experience. It’s even worse when you can hardly form words and stumble into that girl from class you think is really cute. You’re definitely going to see this person over the weekend. Don’t make a fool of yourself. Don’t ask for their number in slurring fashion.
The Kid from Your Floor Freshman Year Who Thinks You’re Friends:
Everybody has that one person who they might have hung around with freshman year, only to have the relationship fizzle out into nothing. Sometimes, one of the parties involved doesn’t understand that the fizzling happened. This individual will be very happy to see you. From your perspective, it might seem too happy. Don’t panic. Talk about the weather and what you did over the past two summers, then get away.
The Pothead With The Backpack:
No party would be complete without the kid in the jeans and the beanie with the Jansport full of weed. You’ll find this person on the couch in the living room so he can use the coffee table as a rolling tray and roll blunts for anyone in the room. If you like pot, sit next to him and talk for ten minutes. He’ll definitely get you high. If not, just say no thank you when he offers and move on.
The Black Sheep warns you that if you go out on a Friday or Saturday night, you are bound to see a handful of cops looking to bust you for open containers. Don’t carry an open container! Period. If a police officer walks into the party you’re at and tells everyone to leave, don’t be the idiot screaming “PARTY!”
The Wild Card:
There’s always one wild card at every party. You’ll know when you see him or her. They’ll try to dunk on the pong table, break windows with their bare hands, or try to jump off the roof into a pit of fire. If you’re party intentions are to make a viral video, keep your eye out for the Wild Card.
Use this list to prepare yourself for the people you’re bound to see this weekend whether you like it or not. You’ll feel better knowing what you’re getting yourself into.
Since when do college apartments have rooftop pools?