Memes are taking over the world and The Black Sheep doesn’t want to get behind on the action. Pitt is full of shit that is so outrageous it could easily become an internet phenomena. The memes are bad, but the feels are real.
The new official name of our chancellor because he is officially a reptilian. Everyone knows the world is run by different lizards, gators, snakes, and Komodo dragon, so why wouldn’t they run our schools too? When some weird shit is going on at Pitt, you know who to blame? The Ghalligator. Use this picture and put words on it like,” Antoon’s raised their price. A scheme of the New Galla-gator order?”
It’s hard to climb hills, and we all know it. There have been way too many articles on here talking about how awful cardiac hill is, but for good reason, because it’s awful. Kids who live on lower campus have no idea. They think having to walk up one flight of stairs to get to their dorm room or “studying for finals” but those on Upper Campus know that the thing harder than any test or gangster is Cardiac Hill. New freshmen beware, you’re in for a heart attack.
You think you and your angsty college problems are that bad? Well, they do suck, but this man, Bill Dorsey, who sits on Forbes and has the voice of an angel has obviously been through a lot of shit. But he’s so badass, he just sits there and sings for everyone walking by. So whenever you’re feeling down, just think of good ol’ Bill sitting there singing his heart out and then go and do something good and/or fun.
F%@k Penn. State
You know how people sarcastically thank Obama all the time? Well now we at Pitt can non-sarcastically say “F%@k Penn State.” Fail your final? FPS. Roommate ate your burrito? FPS. Drop your ID card down a stupid ass elevator shaft? FPS. It’s simple, Panthers, blame everything on someone else, that being Penn State!
The hall, in particular. It’s full of freshmen who aren’t necessarily the nicest people. Everyone has a problem with a freshman at some point or another. They cut lines, they take the last grilled cheese at Market, and they stand in the middle of the sidewalk and talk about which way freaking McDonald’s is. There’s a giant sign, just go there! So, whenever you want to bitch about some freshman breaking your car mirror (which one did to a lot of cars a couple of months back and guess where they were from? Nordenberg) use the classic Dinkleberg, just make it more Pitt-y.