FSU’s incoming class of 2020 is already making its mark with an overactive Facebook group. In it prospective students are desperate to form solid alliances by the time they get to their dorms in Tallahassee, where they will begin their next stepping stone of life. Join the exclusive group and you can see autobiographical posts like, “Hi, I’m a potential bio major who graduated summa cum laude and I like to go on outdoor adventures, watch Netflix, and go to the gym, but I need a gym buddy! I work hard in school but I know how to party on some weekends and relax during others. Message me if you want the perfect friend and follow me on Instagram @horseluver2020” or, “If you were kicked out of the GroupMe comment ur usernames here.”
That’s right, some of the thousands of incoming freshmen have created a giant GroupMe chat where they can get to know one another a little better before their phones burst into flames. But don’t laugh so soon, as some students claim to already have made strong bonds and lifelong friendships through the online group.
“I found my roommate for Summer B on Facebook and we have a ton of things in common. It turns out we both love watching sports and House of Cards, and playing League of Legends. We even found out we’re from the same town and went to the same high school!”
18-year-old John Lipmann told us. “It’s funny, I don’t remember ever seeing or hearing of him, but our graduating class had a whopping 200 students so I guess that’s normal. Can’t wait to meet him and see what he looks like.”
John went on to clarify that his new friend does not have any pictures uploaded to his account or happen to share any mutual friends with him. “I think he’s new to Facebook. Probably only got it to join the FSU group,” assured a hopeful Lipmann.
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Other students, like Jesse Faulkner, have secured more reliable relationships. “I’ve already FaceTimed Mia. We first messaged each other because I made a post saying I wanted someone to try Blaze Pizza with when I get to Tally, and Mia was so down,” Jesse urged, excitedly. “And we decided our friendship was meant to be upon discovering our mutual passion for baby golden retrievers,” said Faulkner. “We’re going to get our own sophomore year when we live off campus together.”
Unfortunately, things with John and his supposed roommate have started to spiral since we last checked in on him. “He’s responding to me less and less, and every time he does send a message, it says something totally irrelevant and weird, like ‘idiot’ or ‘maybe, baby’. The last one was in response to my message about dietary restrictions.” Gluten-free John is now thinking about looking for other potential roommates through the Facebook page.
While social media can certainly make the transition into college a little smoother, it was never expected to result in so many long-lasting friendships between people who have never met. Orientation for the class of 2020 has been cancelled due to the apparent confidence of the new students, and Florida State will instead send an email attached with a virtual ghost tour of the campus.