On Sunday morning, Republican presidential candidate you-know-who brought his campaign to Bloomington. Hoping to secure a victory in Illinois’ primary this Tuesday, Donald “would nail his daughter” Trump gave a speech in Blo-No about how awesome he is. But not everybody was amused by the orange devil. Local citizens have organized a protest group called Dump Trump, which hopes to build a wall to keep Trump from entering Bloomington-Normal, and to make him pay for it.
“The people of Bloomington are some of the greatest people on Earth, they’re great,” said Donald Trump. “I’ve got so many friends in Bloomington. But some folks want to build a wall to keep me out of this fine town, and they want me to pay for it. Now who in their right mind would think that’s a good idea?”
While many in the media are criticizing the protesters’ plan to build a wall, some protesters are proposing even more extreme measures to combat the Trumpster, including a registry of Blo-No’s Trump supporters. Another idea that’s been suggested is to deport Bloomington-Normal’s Trump supporters altogether.
“When Trump sends his people, he’s not sending the best,” one concerned member of Dump Trump stated. “He’s sending people that have lots of problems and they’re bringing those problems here. They’re bringing drugs, they’re bringing crime. They’re racists. And some, I assume, are good people.”
As the organization grew, Dump Trump adopted the phrase “Make America Great Again” as its official slogan. Some, however, feel that this slogan is offensive towards Trump supporters, as it implies that America was better in the days before Trump supporters were appropriately represented. Protesters insist though that the slogan is not prejudiced against Trump supporters, but just against Trump himself.
“I’m confident that if we can build a wall to keep Donald Trump out of our towns, we can finally make America great again,” said one ISU student, who was disappointed that Bernie Sanders showed up at U of I but not ISU. Maybe next month…