Uber, a ride-sharing service that has made its way to Fayetteville, has been striking controversy since it opened its car doors over Labor Day weekend. According to The Arkansas Traveler, Uber is illegal in Fayetteville because drivers are not required to have a taxi license from the state and the car service “does not have the required commercial insurance plan.” Uber car service is still actively driving around Fayetteville and picking up anyone who needs a ride, despite threats from UAPD ticketing anyone operating an Uber car in service. The Fayetteville Police Department is outraged by this sketchy service, but not for reasons one might think.
“We’re concerned that if we allow this kind of taxi service to keep running, things will eventually get out of hand,” Fayetteville police officer, Jordan Anderson, said about Uber, “the boys down at the station have been getting leads about some youngsters who are trying to take this whole car service to another level.”
According to Officer Anderson, some University of Arkansas students have refurbished a red wagon from their childhood and are walking around campus with it and giving students a ride from class to class. The Black Sheep got a hold of one of the suspects using this Red Wagon service on campus. “It’s a sick idea right?” Sophomore Garret Rhodes commented after admitting to being a part of this service. “Some people really hate walking from Walton to Brough, for example. I mean that’s a far walk, right? Just call one of us and we’ll run a wagon to you and you’ll ride easy to your next destination! Free of charge,” Rhodes said with a wink.
UAPD is stumped as to how they can make this new campus service illegal. “They’re avoiding all of the walk-only zones and keeping pace with all the other walkers on campus,” Officer Anderson said, “the university is just going to have to make a new ‘no wagon zone’ for this service to be illegal. Otherwise, we’ll have a hundred wagons on campus hitting people in the shins and it will just be utter chaos.”
According to Rhodes, he and his fraternity brothers are making plans to have more on campus services. For example, Rhodes wants to rent Heelys to every student on campus to make getting to class much quicker than walking. Moped rides will also be available soon for any uphill treks.
“If we raise enough money at our upcoming function we plan to build zip lines all over campus,” Rhodes exclaimed, “it’s gonna be huge!”
The Black Sheep asked Rhodes and his friends if the Uber car service had any influence on the boys’ idea. Rhodes commented, “Uber? I barely know her!” he then laughed and walked away.
For those of you on campus who wish to use this new Red Wagon service to get to your classes, stop a red wagon whenever you see one to find out when the next available ride is, or contact Garret Rhodes at 555-RED-RIDE (555-555-5555), and lookout for the new wagon riding app called Adult Wagon Finder coming out this November.