There are so many reasons to cry. Midterm grades are coming back. Homecoming’s over. It’s mid-October and the walk from Garage D to the Union still leaves you drenched in sweat. Everyone’s hitting that stressful breaking point in the semester and you need to let it all out. Real Knights cry, they just know the best places on campus to do it.
7.) A corner cubicle on the 4th floor:
The 3rd floor is too happy. The 1st floor is too creepy. But the 4th floor is just right! The perfect ultra depressing atmosphere, and you know your quiet sobs won’t be the only ones you hear. Look out the window down onto the campus and think about how small everyone looks, how meaningless life is, how hungry you are now that you see some guy with a Chick-fil-A bag…dammit.
6.) Lake Claire:
Walk out onto the dock and let your feet dangle. As the tears start flowing, the happy students around you will just assume you’re in awe of nature. Or that you’re perpetually stuck in a 2000s music video. Either way, they’ll leave you be and your tears can become one with the lake. And when you’re ready to stop being a little bitch, maybe you can even join in on a game of volleyball.
5.) The koi pond behind Burnett Honors College:
This is for the sophisticated crier only. Look at the beautiful flowers around you. Listen to the steady flow of rushing water. Connect with your emotions. Figure out what’s really bothering you. And don’t be surprised if you start singing Reflection from Mulan into the pond water. It’s pretty standard.
4.) Insomnia Cookies:
Tell the cashier all your woes as you order a dozen chocolate chunk cookies and a pint of ice cream just for yourself. Bonus points if it’s 1 a.m. Bonus bonus points if you’re wearing ratty ass pajamas and a little bit high.
Cry in the corner while still bopping along to the music. If you walk along the perimeter, there’s another girl doing the same thing every 5 feet. You’ll blend right in. Also cry a little extra just because you actually went to Lib. That was a bad decision. You should feel bad.
2.) Your car in a long line at Garage H:
It’s 90º, you just sat through three lectures, and you just want to get home. But you parked on the top floor and now you’ve sat in the exit line for at least twenty minutes. Blast some Adele, get out your frustrated sobs, and continue to inch forward every four or five minutes until you’re finally free from your concrete cage.
1.) Millican Hall:
There’s a million and one reasons to cry at Millican. Can’t register for classes, financial aid didn’t come through, residency denied, pick one. This is the place of broken hopes and dreams so if you ever want some community in your cries or if you ever want a reminder that your life doesn’t suck that bad, head over to Millican.
Every college student has a few breakdowns here and there. Knights just need an extra reminder to take off the armor and let their emotions out. And if you see a fellow Knight crying alone, feel free to walk up to them and suggest your favorite spot on campus to cry. Offer to go cry there together right after your Bio exam at 2.