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6 Legit Ways Clemson’s Campus Will Make You Late for Class

Although you might only have a couple of classes per day, it’s easy to be late every now and again. Getting to class is often the most tedious part of a school day. This list is comprised to validate your excuses when your professor won’t listen to reason.

6.) The CORE campus Starbucks:
You’ve been in the line for ten minutes and there is no way you are quitting now. You need the venti sized Mocha Frappe, or whatever the fuck you call it, and leaving now would be a sunk cost. Just plug that buzzword into your excuse and you’ll be golden. 

5.) The hills:
Majority of students at Clemson are normal people who drink excessively and work out as little as possible. For these normal students there is a simple reason for being late to class: Clemson’s campus has some serious hills. Halfway through your walk to campus you start to notice the sweat rolling off your forehead, burning thighs, and creeping thoughts of regretting everything you’ve ever done. No worries, you’re not alone, literally everyone next to you is running late as well. 

4.) Being frat:
There are not enough hours in the day at Clemson to be a scholar and a frat star. Sometimes you can only choose one. Many students at Clemson choose to skip school in order to remain as frat as possible. Replacing their textbooks for lines of coke and light beer is standard operating procedure, so it should be a pretty standard reason to be late. 

3.) Falling asleep in Cooper:
Every day at Clemson you can walk into Cooper and find someone passed out. Likely they’ve fallen asleep while trying to cram as much useless information into their mind in a single night, maybe using osmosis to let it seep in while they lay their head on top. Class started ten minutes ago, and that dude drooling on his notebook is not going to make it to class on time.

2.) Parking Services:
The parking situation on campus is a disaster. Fake cops driving around in their golf carts with only one goal in mind… To ruin your fucking day with a bullshit ticket. Without a doubt many students have been late to class because they are arguing with the parking services scumbags.

1.) You got drunk downtown between classes:
After you turn 21 something special happens. You realize that during your two hour break between classes you can go downtown and get shit faced for lunch. A quick walk across Bowmen and you are in bad decision heaven. Get a few beers and forget about that class you have in an hour. Wait until you are nice and buzzed up, then head to class 20 minutes late.

Your tardiness might not be excused for these reasons, but that shouldn’t stop you from emailing your professor and quoting this article if you’re frequently late.

Need something to listen to on the way to class? Try out our GIRL POD: 

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