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Incoming Columbia Freshman Fears Her Roommate Might Be Dangerously Obsessed With Disney

For many incoming freshmen, move-in day brings a range of emotions from extreme enthusiasm to utter nervousness. Rising first-year student Lydia Moore admitted she is feeling particularly unsettled regarding her new digs, because she fears her roommate may be obsessed with Disney.

“I got paired with my roommate, and as anyone in my situation would do, I looked her up on Facebook. I knew from the moment I saw her cover photo I was in trouble,” Moore said. She described the image as a watermarked image of Tinkerbell, complete with a quote from Peter Pan in a borderline indecipherable cursive font.

“It’s fine if you like to indulge in the films you enjoyed as a child. I get it. What my fear is the prospect of walking in on move-in day to find that she’s decked out the room complete with a Moana bedspread, Frozen alarm clock— you know, the works,” Moore explained. “I don’t want to feel like I’m rooming with someone who is ten years younger than they actually are.”

According to Moore, her soon-to-be-roommate’s cover photo was merely “the tip of the iceberg.”

“I scrolled further only to find my fears confirmed. At the top of her timeline, there was a photo album uploaded just a few days earlier containing 300 photos of her with her friends at Disney World. And before you ask, yes, she was wearing the Minnie Mouse ears in every single photo.”

Unfortunately for Moore, Adult Disney Fans (also known as ADFs, or more informally, virgins) are not a rare find at Columbia. To the dismay of the majority of their peers, ADFs are pretty commonplace on campus. While most of these students are found in high concentrations within the musical theatre and acting majors, a rogue ADF can pop up any time and any place.

Moore’s fears were confirmed the other day when her roommate messaged her on Facebook as an introduction, including a link to the “Which Disney Princess Are You?” BuzzFeed quiz, claiming it was a way they could “get to know a little bit about each other.”

“I’m not gonna lie, I would trade in my current roommate for someone who has scabies or bed bugs,” Moore admitted, reinforcing how serious she is about the situation.

Listen to Talk of Shame, a podcast about being young & dumb, hosted by 2 drunk girls from The Black Sheep, Mackenzie & Andrea. One can’t find her tampon, the other one’s laundry is probably on fire. Subscribe to Talk of Shame:

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