October 31st is near, and if you’re anything like the majority of Delaware students, there’s a good chance you still don’t have a costume to accidentally spill most of your Natty Light on. Fear not: The Black Sheep is here to hook you up with some quick and easy UD Halloween costumes in which you can hook up with someone quickly and easily.
9.) UD Dining Services worker:
Dressing up like a Dining Services employee is fairly simple; all one needs is a black polo and a pair of khakis. However, in order to truly sell the look, it’s important to wear a morose, hopeless scowl on your face for the entirety of Halloween.
8.) CHEM103 professor:
Looking to wear something terrifying this 31st? Go as a professor for General Chemistry! Dress up in business casual attire, grab some of the graded chemistry exams from last semester that were never picked up, and coat yourself in fake blood.
7.) Squirrel in a trashcan:
Don’t waste money on a full-body squirrel costume this Halloween! All you’ll really need to purchase is a squirrel mask. Conceal the rest of your body within an authentic UD trashcan, which you can steal from somewhere on South Campus. It’s not like anyone will notice its absence, anyway.
6.) UD Shuttle bus driver:
This costume relies more on a prop, but it won’t cost you a dime! Wait at any particular shuttle bus stop for the driver to pull up and, when he or she does, throw the driver off the bus and quickly drive away. Pull up to a frat party for the ultimate laughs!
5.) Student loans:
Run to your local toy store and purchase Monopoly. Take all of the fake currency in the box and glue or tape it to your body such that you resemble nothing more than a giant mound of money. Then, in the frat party bathroom where you’ll inevitably end up, rip all of the money off your body and aggressively flush it down the toilet.
4.) That one freshman who runs to all of his classes:
Bring an overstuffed backpack with you to wherever you go out on Halloween and ensure that it weighs significantly more than you do. Once you’ve nailed the look, make sure to keep your head down all night, move swiftly and make zero eye contact with anyone you come across.
3.) A train:
Consider dressing up as one of the numerous trains that passes through Newark on any given day. Wear a few cardboard boxes around your torso and paint them grey; then, when you venture out for the night, stand in the road for approximately seven minutes and scream loudly, all the while backing up traffic for at least a mile.
2.) One of Kirkbride Jesus’s posters:
There’s always a few Blue Hens each year who go as Kirkbride Jesus for Halloween and end up dropping too much money on posters and other props. This year, save a few bucks by actually dressing up as KJ’s hateful propaganda. Try wearing a white t-shirt and writing something dramatically hateful on it, such as “SODOMY PAVES THE HIGHWAY TO HELL.”
Per the helpful suggestion made by UD’s Department of Public Safety many years ago, it’s important to stay warm and stay safe this Halloween. Keep the mitten legacy alive by running over to your local craft store to pick up some fabric on the cheap and stitch it into something that resembles a giant mitten that you can wear. Alternatively, you can also consider wearing mittens on your hands and nothing else. Your naked body might be exposed to the elements, but it’s okay, because mittens are warmer than gloves!