Last night’s Sour 16 game against Gorgonzola was a friggin’ nail biter. Even though FSU was up practically the whole game, that last minute or so when the Noles led by fifteen were super stressful. Lucky for us, the Gorgons didn’t pull sixteen points out of their butts, and we won! Now you get to go around saying these completely true and accurate statements.
6.) “We NaTtY cHaMps!”:
Take a note from UCF here and buy a champion shirt now. We may not have actually won a championship game (yet), but we got this far, and that’s more than most can say.
5.) “You talkin’ to me?”:
You talkin’ ‘bout the Elite 8 so you MUST be talkin’ to me. We’ll frick you up, bro. Phil Cofer is 6’8” and 218 pounds of unbridled talent. We may not know each other personally, but I’ll get him to WRECK YOUR SHIT.
4.) “We’re the Michael Jordan of basketball.”:
Not to brag, but we just beat 4-seed Lady Gagazola and the Noles are going to the Elite 8 for the first time in 25 years. Mike’s number was 23. Coincidence????? Start practicing your G.O.A.T. screams now.
3.) “Fuck the Gators, bitch.”:
Always relevant, but this one just feels right after their salty tweet with the Gondola mascot colored in blue and orange. Guess what, UF? We own the damn state.
2.) “Please hold the door, thank you.”:
This is if someone’s already at the door and maybe isn’t so wary of you approaching.
1.) “We’re in the Elite 8.”:
In case you didn’t know. Take that, Gorgarrhea!
FSU faces off against 3-seeded Michigan tomorrow night at 8:49, so you have at least a full day to use these phrases as often as possible before getting drunk and rooting for the annihilation of the Wolverines.
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