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Harry Potter Fans NOT Happy with Union Suwannee

Muggles far and wide come to Florida State each year to see the Suwannee Dining Hall on campus tours. Just ask any University Ambassador what the old dining hall looks like and they’ll tell you Suwannee “looks just like the Great Hall thing from Harry Potter.”

However, the university’s decision to renovate Suwannee and temporarily move the buffet to the Union has Potterheads worried that the resemblance to the fictional dining hall will soon be lost.

“It’s a complete outrage! I refuse to believe this is happening,” said Melanie Jennings, a fifth-year senior at FSU. “The whole reason I came to this school and continue to attend is to support Suwannee’s aesthetic.”

Since 1913, the Suwannee dining hall has been the principal dining location on the FSU campus. However, despite all the memories that might have been made there, any 105-year-old establishment is inevitably going to require maintenance and even renovations from time to time. The decision to renovate the building has brought nostalgia to the forefront.

“Since the 3rd grade, I’ve been a huge Potterhead,” said Melanie. “Hermione Granger has always been my role model. Eating on campus just doesn’t feel the same now.”

Perhaps even more distraught than the self-proclaimed “muggles” at FSU is the school’s official quidditch team. Although it’s a sport entirely inspired by the Harry Potter series, the variant of quidditch played on campus doesn’t require flying on broomsticks. Naturally, tempers flared when the most prominent Potter-like building on campus was slated to be refurbished.

“It feels like a slap in the face,” said Bludger captain Jacob Wellingworth, as he snapped in half a broomstick with “Firebolt 3000 written in Sharpie. “Not enough of this school’s architecture takes after Hogwarts. Thrasher seriously pulled our rug by taking this away from us. I bet he thinks of himself as some golden snitch.”

Florida State Harry Potter fans are disappointed because the redesign of Suwannee means that there could possibly be one less Hogwarts-esque establishment on campus. Other students are more critical of the fact they have to eat in the less dignified Union for the time being.

According to FSU’s news website, the renovations are working to improve Suwannee’s “culinary experience”, while the building’s interior Gothic architecture will remain intact. Like it or not, meal plans are non-refundable.

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