Move over Jersey Shore, there’s a new hot mess we love to hate-watch: the Brian Kemp campaign commercial. While Brian Kemp is, uh, entertaining (?), he’s also downright terrifying, but midterms are ‘tis the season of spook! So, here goes some classic horror movies up against Brian Kemp…
5.) Kemp vs. Rampage:
A film about a gun-obsessed lunatic enforcing his will on others? Who gave the greenlight for this Kemp documentary?
4.) Kemp vs. The Dark Knight:
One’s a maniac with too much facepaint who thrives on chaos, hatred, and evil, and the other is the joker. It’s a thinker, so we’ll give you a moment to decipher who’s who…
3.) Kemp vs. The Texas Chain Saw Massacre:
Leatherface and his family love to kill and eat people with some good ‘ol fashioned chainsaws. While we can’t speak from personal experience, sources say that Kemp and his family are the same way!
2.) Kemp vs. Easy Rider:
Two words we’ve all been wanting to tell Kemp: “Easy, rider!” Like, please, chill the fuck out. (Btw, your truck ain’t that big, sweetie.)
1.) Kemp vs. Get Out:
Brian Kemp hasn’t yet mastered hypnotism, so for now, he resorts to the power vested in him through the Second Amendment to ensure respect for his daughters.
So, please – go vote or sleep with a night light for the rest of your life because this shit is scary.
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