Nowadays to pull off that annoying aesthetic, many people are watching Netflix documentaries as a way of pretending they care about the world outside of Instagram. So, we believe it’s time that UGA get in on the action and drop some hints about what we would like to see pop up in our Netflix suggestions in 2017.
6.) The Great UNG Diaspora:
This would be a journalistic report on the dark origins of why the hell there are so many UNG people creeping in on UGA territory. We want a team of highly qualified individuals, preferably Nobel Prize winners, to do some research and get some insight into the UNG immigration problem. Have they reached the capacity on annoying Dawg wannabees? Or is it because they are permanently drunk and can’t tell the difference between the two schools?
In this informative piece of cinema, we take a deep look into the horrendous treatment of UGA’s famous mascot, Uga. Some believe that the beloved gem of UGA’s pep has been mistreated for years, namely by not being given the doghouse he deserves. It has even been said that his mistreatment has caused him to burst out in anger and attack some of the UGA cheer team.
4.) The Final Countdown:
This would be an investigative scoop story behind the BS of graduating in four years thing.” It’s become obvious that the promise of graduating on time is kinda like a unicorn–not real. Especially if you do everything your advisor says. The film would also last about 5 hours to represent the amount of time you are likely to be in school.
3.) President Morehead: The True Hollywood Story:
Everyone on campus can tell you who the president of our fine establishment is, but few people know who he was before he became our infamous president. Many students want to know more about Morehead, so it’s time to get a biographical piece done highlighting all the people he stepped on to get to his throne today.
2.) Hairy Dog: The Dog Behind Mask:
We are all familiar with Hairy Dog. He is the face of UGA, and UGA shoves him down your throat every opportunity they get. But what do we really know about this oversized canine? Allegations have been made accusing him of not being a real dog, and in fact living a lie, so it’s clearly time we get to the bottom of it.
1.) Milledge Row:
In this story, a team of blonde girls go undercover and reveal the secrets behind UGA Greek Life. We’re talking full-on whistleblowing, all cards on the table. We’re talking e-mail level scandal people. First revelation? The truth about why social themes are so extra.
We realize the likelihood of one these documentaries coming to life is small, but we couldn’t help but throw the ideas around. Our curiosities are partly fueled by a desire for justice, but they’re mostly just because if we watch another documentary about serial killers, we’re going to go off harder than any preacher in Tate.
Best signs from Women’s Marches Across the Globe: