We’re all proud of our Grand Valley heritage, but nowhere near as proud as U of M students. We get it. You’re DI and you’ve got such a rich history and Detroit is a hub of development and history, blah blah blah–but it’s not all it’s cracked up to be! Here are 10 ways GV can show U of M that west is best.
We’ll start with the boring ones. Tuition costs. If you’re in the Mitten, GVSU gives you a quality education for much less money. Plus, you don’t have to live 16 people to a house like you do in Ann Arbor. If you’re out of state, Grand Valley is 60% cheaper, proving that U of M is xenophobic to those not from Michigan.
9.) Small town Allendale:
Allendale might be a small town, but if anything, that just helps Lakers focus on their studies. The turkey smell can even keep you indoors to finish projects! Ann Arbor is the sixth largest city in Michigan, must be hard!
8.) We have Louie:
Their mascot is literally a color. We don’t know what this “wolverine” business is, but whenever we overhear people talk about Michigan sports they just say, “Go Blue!” which is lame. Not to mention that a wolverine would be no match for Louie’s cunning and sailing skills.
7.) T. Haas:
Despite our beloved president retiring, the man has been an inspiration. Do you think Michigan’s president makes the student body pancakes? Yeah, we didn’t think so.
6.) Greek life:
Michigan had to suspend all their Greek life last year. At Grand Valley, our sororities and fraternities manage to buy friends and party while still respecting their fellow classmates. You don’t have to haze Lakers into drinking, because it’s really the only way to stay warm.
5.) Professors actually teach classes:
At GVSU, when you sign up for a class with a professor, you roll up to class and get to learn from that professor. At UMich, you might end up learning linear algebra from a 22-year-old grad student who has Tumblr pulled up next to his blackboard account. Be grateful for those old professors who don’t ever post grades. At least most of them aren’t named “Zack.”
4.) Grand Rapids:
While we know GR has been a “growing city” for the better part of the 21st century, there’s a lot to it. It’s cheap to live in and there are a lot of opportunities. “Beer City U.S.A.” is a plus as well! The simple answer is that living in Ann Arbor costs about as much as our tuition.
While you might have to explain where exactly you went to college to the people you meet in your future, you’ll never experience the earth-shattering eye roll that comes from saying “I went to Michigan.” The general public knows to batten down the hatches after this phrase is uttered. Similar to “I do cross-fit,” or “When I studied abroad.”
2.) Lake Michigan:
As much as the lake effect winters are a struggle, the beaches of Lake Michigan are insane in the summer, and they’re almost as close to GV as the city of Grand Rapids. To make it even better, here on the west side, there are almost never dead bodies in the water!
1.) It’s not SVSU:
Alright, so this one’s a tie. Whether you’re a fan of the east or the west, every student at both schools can agree that SVSU is the worst.
Though U of M might be fancier and larger than Grand Valley, that doesn’t mean it has it all. Where GVSU lacks in notoriety, it makes up for in heart–never mind the off-putting turkey smell!
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