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Laker Gang: Since No One Knows The Alma Mater Lyrics, GV Will Change It To Lil Pump’s ‘Gucci Gang’

“Gucci Gang” is now the official GVSU Alma Mater. Did the administration go too far with their unexpected change of GVSU’s Alma Mater? 

Many proponents of the change to the Alma Mater’s lyrics cited the well-known fact that absolutely no knows the lyrics to the song. Even though they display the lyrics on massive screen, the drunk students struggle to read words greater than two syllables.

The head of GVSU marketing and community outreach, Bethany Marks, justified the move.

“Mumble rap is the future of mainstream music,” Marks said. “Therefore, our Alma Mater needs to stay in touch with the youth. Lil Pump released ‘Gucci Gang’ at the ripe age of 17. Yea, I know the crusty old dude that wrote the Alma Mater did a lot for GV, but that shit don’t slap. Look, in this world, it’s yeet or be yeeted, and we gotta say yeet to him, fam. We wish him the best though.”

Although most students agree with the change, some seasoned faculty have their reservations about the surprise changeup.

One professor, who wished to stay anonymous, raised concerns with the explicit content in the lyrics.

“I know modern society is just one big shit post, but damn…really? Are we just going to condone illicit drug use and degrading language? Let me read you some of these Gucci Gang lyrics: ‘My lean cost more than your rent, ooh your mama still live in a tent, yeah.'” 

She paused and contemplatesdleaving the university before it’s too late.

“What’s next?” the professor asked. “Let me guess: Lean in the water fountains?”

The Laker Marching Band also plans on getting in on the action, trading in their drums and tubas for 808s and SoundCloud accounts. Officially, T. Haas has not commented on the change, but off-the-record, some claim to have overheard him saying, “Laker football games this year are going to be dumb lit fam.”

The Black Sheep hasn’t confirmed this account.

Although the change is controversial, many welcome the change and embrace the change of scenery for the school. Other petitions, like the one to change the fight song to ‘FeFe’ by Tekashi69, haven’t managed to garner the same kind of support, but that may change as well soon.

Listen to Talk of Shame, a podcast about being young & dumb, hosted by 2 drunk girls from The Black Sheep, Mackenzie & Andrea. One can’t find her tampon, the other one’s laundry is probably on fire. Subscribe to Talk of Shame:

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