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What To Do When Someone’s Sitting in Your Seat at the MIP Library

Everyone knows that as finals get closer and closer, finding a spot at the library becomes GV’s version of The Hunger Games. But what happens when you head into the library, and someone is sitting in your favorite spot? Instead of being a quitter and trying to find somewhere else, try these techniques:

6.) Flip the table:

A classic approach. Get your frustration out by a little destruction of property! So what if you destroy someone’s computer or put a dent in the floor? You have to show them who they decided to mess with.

5.) Watch them from outside the nearest window:

If flipping tables isn’t your style, you can always take a more subtle approach by perching outside and staring at them through the windows. Even if your favorite spot is on the top floor, scale the walls like Spiderman. Nothing will scare someone faster than seeing you outside a fourth story window. Just wait, they’ll be out of there in no time.

4.) Pull the fire alarm:

In a pinch, this is a good way to clear out the entire library. While everyone’s rushing outside, trailing laptop chargers the whole way, you can sneak in and take back what’s rightfully yours. Or, if GVPD arrests you, you can always study down in the county jail. At least you’ll be able to find a seat there.

3.) Sit on their lap:

The ultimate power move! Someone’s sitting in your seat? Wrong: they are your seat now. It’ll show them and everyone else that no one is to come between you and your favorite spot. You’re not afraid to make things awkward, but they sure will be afraid of you and leave ASAP.

2.) Fake an announcement from a professor:

All you have to do is pretend to be a professor and make an announcement on Blackboard that final exams are canceled. The library will be vacant as everyone heads home to celebrate, and you’ll have your spot before anyone suspects a thing.

1.) Challenge them to a death match:

If all else fails, you can always settle this Mortal Kombat style. Challenge the asshole in your seat to a duel whether it be with fists, swords, or even Yu-Gi-Oh! cards. The winner gets the seat. Just make sure you win no matter what even if it involves cheating or an illegal kick to the groin.

Finals can bring out the worst in people. Usually it’s better to find a peaceful solution, but we don’t expect that from anyone this time of year. Sometimes, you just really need your spot. But in case it’s taken, kick their ass and break their things.

 

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