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Top 10 Things Lakers Are Already Missing About Home

Home is a special place that nothing compares to. Now that break is over you’re going to have to get used to cooking for yourself and paying for your own shit–it’s a rough transition. For Lakers missing home, we’ve compiled a list of things to reminisce on as you sit in the cold sadness that is your dorm at Grand Valley.

10.) Grandma’s farts:

Grandma Farting

Nothing quite says “home” like hearing your grandma rip one. Her frail body can’t control what it does at this point and hearing her fart really just makes you realize how lucky you are to still have her around.

9.) Home-cooked meals:

Home cooked meals (1)

Anything that’s made for you at home is considered a home cooked meal. Even that bowl of pickles and milk your hungover mom gave you on New Year’s Day is better than anything you or Fresh can “cook.”

8.) Getting drunk alone:

drunk alone

While this may seem like something you can do at school, you’ll have friends and roommates that want to join in at GVSU. At home you get to drink without sharing or socializing and that’s really the best Christmas gift of all.

7.) Your own bed:


A sad reality is that every college student has two beds. The one at home offers a place of relaxation while the one at GVSU belongs to not only you but the dozens of students before you. Let’s be honest, there’s a 90% chance that some dude probably jizzed all over it once or thrice.

6.) Having a place to park:

place to park

A parking space is always open for you at home and it’s usually a 20-foot walk from your car to your door. GVSU students know this isn’t the case on campus. Walking to class is a 20-minute trek through tundra. Make sure you brought back your boots and parka, it’s about to get frigid in this bitch.

5.) Family:


Maybe you won’t miss your family that much while back at school. You probably had to deal with your grandma hitting on your boyfriend at Christmas, but maybe you’ll feel a hint of sadness as you hit a bong with no one around to yell at you for it.  

4.) Not doing your laundry:

laundry (1)

Winter break is the only time it’s acceptable to throw your clothes down the stairs and ask your mom to wash them for you. She might have combatted this action with “You’re 19 years old, wash your own damn clothes!” but you were too busy playing RuneScape on full volume to hear her. Eventually, your clothes ended up washed and folded with no effort on your part.

3.) Seeing old friends:

There are two types of “old friends” that you’ll miss when you get back to school. There are the old friends that would give you weed and then there are the old friends that you tried stabbing once in high school. Back at GVSU, you’ll either miss the weed or the fact that you had the opportunity to stab those friends one last time. You always have winter break next year so start planning!

2.) Having time to bathe:


Personal hygiene is very important, however, you might find yourself only showering every three days at GVSU because you had class, homework, or an old episode of Spongebob came on at 3:00 a.m. Whatever the case, you’ll miss when you had time for an hour long shower back at home.

1.) Pets:


Pets are, without a doubt, the thing you’ll miss most about being at home. At home you could stare at them for hours watching them sleep, petting, or playing with them. At school, that’s just not an option. The best you can do is make a sibling or your mom send you pictures of your dog every hour.


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