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Morgan Street Station Worker Could Give a S*** if You Steal Something

With hundreds of students passing through BSB every day, the Morgan Street Station convenient store gets an overload of foot traffic. With the traffic comes students who will grab and dash like it’s nothing, and no one really cares. Sophomore cashier, Eli Stael, is sick and tired of people thinking that theft is any more than a petty crime.

“I could give a shit,” Eli Stael told The Black Sheep, “I’ve worked here for a year and I’ve seen kids do all sorts of crazy things to hide chips they’re stealing. It doesn’t faze me anymore.”

Remembering some of schemes he’s witnessed, Stael reminisced to The Black Sheep, “I saw two kids fake a fight so that their buddy could dip out the side door towards UH with two bags of Flamin’ Hot Cheetos. Another pulled the typical ‘pocket of the coat’ while I was checking someone else out at the register. They’re not slick at all.”

The convenient store that is located in BSB is a primary stop for students gearing up for a full day of sleeping through lectures and trying to hide in their discussion sections so they don’t have to participate.

“People think that since we’re UIC-affiliated that we’ll crack down on theft. It’s quite the opposite, actually. Like any other UIC kid, I want to avoid confrontation as much as possible,” Stael said. “Honestly you could probably walk out of here with the damn drink fridge and I wouldn’t do anything.”

Detailing security processes within the store, Stael gave us some insider details:

“Well, if I see something sketchy happening I’ll inform the head of security… it takes them so long to get here that they never actually catch the guy. And I’ll be damned if I have to move from behind this desk while I’m working.”

The Black Sheep reached out to UIC’s Building Security for comment:

“I’s a process,” Mike Denver, security’s newest hire, noted. “But an effective one.”

Denver told The Black Sheep. “We typically take 3-5 minutes to respond to any suspicious behavior going on inside university buildings. If we ever respond late to a scene we investigate, question, and almost always get the guy.”

“They never get the guy,” Stael said. “I don’t think they’ve ever gotten a guy. All they do is look at security footage and talk about how they’ll keep an eye out for them. Since there are so many kids in and out of here they never get anyone. I’m telling you, anything you want is yours — just walk out with it. No one’s going to stop you.”

UIC’s Building Security has no plans to change protocol, while workers inside the convenience store have been thinking about taking matters into their own hands.

“Maybe I’ll yell ‘oh no, stop!’,” Stael said. “But only if my boss starts giving me shit.”

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