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If ISU Colleges Were Snapchat Filters

While we all love the standard “ISU Quad” filter, like COM 110, it can get boring after about three days. ISU has a total of three Snapchat filters, and they’re all Watterson oatmeal style bleh. So, after shamelessly judging the shit out of all you Redbirds, The Black Sheep has decided which filter best describes you based on your college.

7.) College of Applied Science and Technology – Creepy Fucking Alien:

creepy-alien-isu

There are few things ISU students don’t understand: advanced math, moderate drinking, and wtf the College of Applied Science and Technology is. CAST is the ISU equivalent of the creepy fucking alien filter. Because like an alien, the average student has heard of CAST, yet knows very little about it. It’s mysterious. All we know is that agriculture is in CAST, and like outer space, University Farms is at least ten minutes away from campus.

6.) College of Arts and Sciences – Deer in Headlights:

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The College of Arts and Sciences has all the majors who don’t know what the hell is going on, like Bambi bumbling around in the forest. CAS students give us that deer-in-headlights look when asked, “So what are you going to do with that major?” But hey, what CAS majors lack in post-grad plans, they make up for in adorableness and ~good vibes~.

5.) College of Business – Weird Ass Globe Head:

globe-face

Where are ISU’s business majors? On your floor in Manchester. Eating at McAlister’s. Working at State Farm. These fuckers are literally everywhere, so their filter is the weird globe face. We don’t even need a compass to find them; they’re easy to spot by their business causal clothes, smug faces, and sexy pleather padfolios.

4.) College of Education – The OG Dog:

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The dog face is one of the OG filters. Are we sick of people using it? Sure. Are we tired of its annoying slobbery tongue? Yeah. Are we sick of hearing it bitch about student teaching and lesson plans? Of course we are. But the College of Education, similar to the dog filter, is the OG of ISU. The university was founded as a teaching school, so as much as we hate running into another history ed major at Daddio’s, we have to respect these nerds because they were here first.

3.) College of Fine Arts – Overly Dramatic Rose Throwing:

rose-throwing

The College of Fine Arts is the overly dramatic rose throwing filter. Like CFA students, this filter is so extra. It literally makes a ten second snap video into a full-scale production with props, music, and a fog machine. Who does that? Theater kids and art majors, that’s who. They always need to add a little extra pizzazz. These are the Sharpays and Ryans of ISU. They are so perky and lively, that by the end of a conversation you will actually want to throw something at them.

2.) Mennonite College of Nursing – Wiggy Old Lady:

wiggy-lady

Nursing majors are basically the wiggy old lady filter. Like your grandma, they read a shit ton, go to bed early, and wake up before the rooster at University Farms even has a chance to crow. But as symbolized by the funky pink wig, lipstick, and glasses, they’re down to clown. They will get you messed up. Don’t even try to keep up with them.

1.) Milner Library – Quiet Little Mouse:

mouse-isu

Nobody knows that Milner Library is an academic college. But like a mouse, even if no one knows it’s there, oh, it’s still there. The Milner students, unseen and unheard, are somewhere being quiet and probably smelling mildly of stolen cheese.

Honestly, the best filter to describe ISU students would be a giant cardinal with beady that gets too drunk at the pregame. Unfortunately, until ISU gets it together and creates this filter, these ones will have to do. 

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