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7 Signs the Guy You’re Flirting With Might Be an Undercover Cop

Reading Day Eve can trigger a great deal of emotions. You have one more night on campus to get wasted, but you know you have a day of hungover studying ahead of you. Plus, cops have gotten smarter and know students thrive on this night, so they decide to pretend they aren’t cops and give more drinking tickets when us silly students start flirting. The audacity! Here are 7 signs the guy you’re flirting with is an undercover cop this Reading Day Eve:

7.) He Keeps Asking to See Your ID:
Does he want to make sure you’re not lying about your name? You’ve never heard this pickup line before, and it’s a little odd, but you’re interested because he’s cute. You show him your 19-year-old ID, and he gives you a sort of sexy, disappointed look. You’re very drunk, and think you’ve found your potential hook-up for the night!

6.) He’s 50 Years Old:
He must be a grad student, or one of those guys in college who looks old for their age! Your vision is blurry so you can’t see his wedding ring, and think he’s one of those hipster dudes who wears rings as a “guys can wear jewelry” statement. That’s hot. You usually go for douchebags, but you have a feeling that this guy is different and that you can fix him.

5.) He Showed You His Badge:
He must’ve had an exchange theme, and he dressed up as a cop. Since you’re hammered, you can’t read the letters that say “Champaign Police Department,” so you continue to make moves on this mystery man. He won’t put his badge away, and for some reason he looks angry. You’re already invested in this guy, so you keep pursuing. The good ones don’t always come easy!

4.) He’s Not Reciprocating:
Is he not interested? You’re genuinely offended that he’s completely ignoring your flirty comments. You know your look because you saved your best going out outfit for the last day before finals. He won’t even pay for your drinks. All he’s doing is trying to pull you out of the bar so you can go back to his frat and hook-up. He probably won’t even pay for your Uber on the way home in the morning. College boys suck!

3.) He’s Putting You in Handcuffs:
There is a good time and place for handcuffs, but this is not it. You’re confused why he’s not waiting until you get back to his frat house for this kinky shit, but for some reason you’re kind of into it. You’re pissed at your friends because they’re screaming at you across the bar and trying to ruin it with your new guy, but you know they’re just jealous.

2.) He Takes You to a Police Car:
Now you know something’s up. Maybe his friend is one of those cops that eat in the Bromley dining hall. Remember that you’re still intoxicated and stupid, so it still hasn’t hit you what is happening right now. A lot of people have made this mistake in the past, so don’t feel too bad about yourself.

1.) He Gives You a Drinking Ticket:
You fucked up. All the signs were there, but the 17 Blue Guys you iced out must have gone straight to your head. The bad news is you got a drinking ticket right before the most stressful week of the year. The good news is, you didn’t actually sleep with a 50-year-old married man.

A drinking ticket is not the way you want to start finals week. But at least you’ll have Reading Day to formulate what you’re going to say to your disappointed parents over the phone.

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