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Illinois

Bartender of the Week: The Clybourne’s Scales

 

Name: Scales

Bar: The Clybourne

Relationship Status: Happily married with 10 kids and 6 carrier pigeons.

Major: Box

Favorite Drink: “Juices”

Favorite Shot: Fuel

Disgusting Drink: Gin

 

Which childhood insult would be the best name for a mixed drink?:

Donkey Brains.

 

What would be in Donkey Brains?:

A shot of rum and Hamm’s beer.

 

What hashtag most accurately describes your last hook-up?:

#fuckdanburke

 

Who would win in a drinking competition between you and your dad? Why?:

Me, because he’s weak.

 

What was the last thing that made you feel very stupid?:

Sending my dad to the hospital during a drinking contest.

 

Give us your billion-dollar app idea:

An app for finding the best place to poop.

 

What was the last thing you immediately regretted upon waking up?:

Sleeping on the street.

 

What is something you’re certain is true, but has not been proven?:

You can milk a full grown man with nothing but a bag of chips and a car battery.

 

Which current fashion trend will society most regret in 15 years?:

Banana hammocks.

 

Provide proof you’re not a member of the Illuminati:

Don’t tell me what to do.

 

Why should people read The Black Sheep?:

For the personal ads 😉

 

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