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Daddy Of The Week: Dylan From DU

Name: Dylan Firth
Twitter Handle: N/A
Major: Communication
Relationship Status: Married to a lifetime of a physical fitness.
Fraternity: Delta Upsilon
Boxers or briefs?: Depends on how windy it is.

How many pairs of New Balances do you own?:
Zero.

How impressive are your limbo skills?:
Not as good as my deadlift.

What sets you apart from every dad in the Chicago suburbs?:
Let me see them do a triple Whip-It.

Suppose your teenage son is on Grindr at the dinner table. WYD?:
Ask if I’m in his profile pic.

Which SpongeBob episode will you make sure your kids watch?:
The one where Squidward is in the fetal position screaming “futuuuuuuure!”

At what age will you tell your kids about your filthy Illini years?:
They already know.

Who’s a sitcom dad you aspire to be like?:
Frank Reynolds from It’s Always Sunny.

Tell us a dad joke:
What did the mother buffalo say to the son buffalo when he was going away to college? Bye, son.

Why do you deserve to be Daddy of the Week?:
I don’t; I deserve to be daddy of the year.

Why should people read The Black Sheep?:
It’s more credible than The Daily Illini.

Listen to Talk of Shame, a podcast about being young & dumb. Hosted by 2 drunk girls from The Black Sheep corporate, Mackenzie Harding & Andrea Jablonski. One can’t find her tampon, the other one’s laundry is probably on fire. Subscribe to Talk of Shame:

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