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5 Study Spots For When You’re Too Cool To Study By Geeds

When you’re not crushing it and hitting the bars, you have to be hitting the books. The only problem is that you’re way too cool to study next to these lame geeds. Here are the top 5 study spots for when you’re a top house legend, but you also need to pass your classes:

5.) At the tables at The Red Lion:
You’d think when it’s time to study, you’d have to take a break from The Red Lion. That isn’t the case for those of us in top houses. Any minute spent away from Lion lowers your status in the grand Greek social scale. From living in a frat, you’re used to the noise anyways. Crack open a Lion brewski and crack down on your books.

4.) Outside of the UGL:
Working at the Undergrad Library is risky because you may just affiliate with lame geeds. It’s always way too crowded there, and you can’t take the risk of potentially sitting next to a loser. Take your books right next to the sign that says no smoking, and be sure to bring your cigs. Everyone knows nicotine helps with focusing and overall looking sick as fuck.

3.) Your frat:
The safest call of them all – just study with your frat brothers. You know they’re not lame geeds because they were literally initiated with you. (There’s just something magical about being hazed together.) You just feel ultra-connected with them about the brotherhood, and if you can trust them to keep all your brotherhood hazing secrets, you can trust them to quiz you before you take your PSYC 100 midterm.

2.) McDonald’s:
McDizzle! Bro, if Ronald McDonald’s was a person and went to UIUC, he’d definitely be in a top house. McDonald’s is always the plug with major deals on some hearty meals. Sometimes there’s a DJ at McDonald’s that can help you tune into your homework. Working at McDonald’s looks like the worst job, so it can also work as an inspiration for you to continue studying your recreational sports and tourism textbook so you don’t have to end up flipping burgers.

1.) The Bromley lobby:
Yeah okay, Bromley’s full of fucking freshman. But, all the freshman are guaranteed to be in top houses because they’re rich, and they’ll be lit as hell. Everyone knows Bromley is the most frat dorm in UIUC’s existence (and probably in this whole country). If you want to avoid some geeds, but are in need of some study time, study at the Bromley lobby. Take advantage of their coffee machine and pool table while for a chill study break with some of the new pledges.

Being a good student shouldn’t have to mean sacrificing your top house status that you worked so hard to achieve. There are enough frat-approved study spots on campus for you to be able to be a double threat: frat star and scholarly stud. Good luck on midterms, bros!

Oh Listen to Talk of Shame, a podcast about being young & dumb. Hosted by 2 drunk girls from The Black Sheep corporate, Mackenzie Harding & Andrea Jablonski. One can’t find her tampon, the other one’s laundry is probably on fire. Subscribe to Talk of Shame:

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