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7 Types of People You’ll Find on the ‘I Grew Up in Iowa!’ FB Group

Who really runs the extremely popular “I Grew Up in Iowa!” Facebook group? There are the sassy, funny commenters who instigate UIowa vs. ISU fights, the curious ones who are just wondering who here is from Dubuque, and there are the tough-as-nails admins who make sure everyone plays by the rules and will quickly kick out anyone who does not. Without further ado, here are the 7 types of people you’ll find in the “I Grew Up in Iowa!” FB group:

7.) That one dude who gets offended by literally everything:
“My first concert was Led Zepplin!” said the innocent older dude who just wanted to make some new friends. “Ugh, seriously?! You call yourself a music lover? Everyone knows the Rolling Stones are so much better.” Why you gotta be so rude, 31-year-old Brendan from Marion who fixes motorcycles?!

6.) The girl who posts a video of her animal sitting there doing nothing for 2 minutes:
There’s nothing cuter than a dog just sitting…and sitting… and sitting… and, OH WAIT SHE BLINKED. Jaqueline from Ames posts the video with the caption, “Just thought I’d share this awesome vid! Go Hawkeyes!” The video somehow gets thousands of views with a mixture of comments. It ranges from: “OH MY GOD! SHE. IS. CUUUUUTTTTEEEE” to “Kill yourself.”

5.) That “what’s your favorite color?” scam artist:
Because everyone obviously cares about what your favorite color is. Especially that one dude who says “chartreuse.” Obviously, the OP is trying to steal all of your money and info through Facebook. In fact, “I Grew Up In Iowa” admins recently posted a police note to make sure people stopped answering personal questions like, “What’s your mother’s maiden name?” Yet Scam Kween continues to ask, “What was the name of your first pet?”

4.) The man who replies, “I bleed black and gold! GO HAWKS!”:
This. Guy. Always has to be cool and talk about how much he loves the Hawkeyes. It’s hard to not love the Hawks, but when someone asks “What’s your favorite season?,” the correct response is not automatically “Hawkeye season!”

3.) The “Remember when Clinton Street used to be full of cute little shops and now it’s all just drunk college idiots?” gal:
“Back before these entitled millennials took over all of Iowa City, we used to have the best damn town in the state!” This gal always seems to think that everything in Iowa City used to be better when they were young. Bars used to be cooler, students used to be nicer, and Herky used to be more iconic. Anyone who tries to argue with this gal gets a swift boot from the group.

2.) That person who ruins every holiday, no matter what it is:
“Easter should be about JESUS CHRIST, I just don’t understand why we need to spoil our kids with all this candy.” This lady doesn’t want anyone to enjoy anything, ever. Chances are, her profile photo is a blurry webcam selfie or an American flag. Anytime someone says, “My kids were so excited when the Easter bunny came this year!” the fun-ruiner responds “Wrong.” Chill, Margie.

1.) The person who’s like, “How many different ways do you guys know how to cook your corn?”:
She just wants to be able to cook all that Iowa corn to the best of her ability. She’s the one that wants recipe advice so she can make her loving husband a meal he’s had about 5,000 times. Sadly, this post will always elicit the following responses: “creamed,” “boiled,” “grilled,” “cornbread casserole,”  and “kill yourself.”

“I Grew Up in Iowa” is like a lot of Facebook groups out there, but it’s also unique in its own way. Underneath all the “you’re obviously wrong”s, there’s lots of love to go around. Folks come together around their love of Iowa and their aspirations to meet new people. Join today, and see how long you can go without being cyberbullied by someone’s grandmother! 

 

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