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Memorial Stadium to Undergo $300 Million Renovation After Winning 2 Whole Games Last Season

Following the exciting 2-10 KU Football season, the University of Kansas Athletics Department has announced the plans for the 300 million dollar renovation for the Kansas Memorial Stadium.

The KU Athletics department was more than happy to comment on their celebration for our star-studded team.

“After the team’s recent performance celebrating not just one, but TWO wins, we’re actually starting to see students stick around for longer than 35 minutes,” commented KU athletics director Madison Leighton. “I can’t wait to see the excitement on the students faces when they see what a massive 300 dollar donation is going to do for our school, or I guess football team.”

Both fans and athletes alike were elated by the news of the upcoming changes for our prestigious football team.

“It’s great to finally receive the recognition we deserve,” stated first-string water-boy Phillip Corner standing by with cups in hand. “We put in the work and the half-filled stadium always saw that.”

The new renovations also bring exciting new opportunities for avid KU football tailgaters. We caught up with junior and heralded keg-stander Mike “the pike” Gregory for his thoughts on the new additions to the stadium.

“It’s fuggin dope,” stated Mike rising from his fifth beer bong of the day. “We needed more space for my truck and beer bong table anyways.” When Mike was asked about how many of the games he tailgated then attended, Mike had no further comments.

As of now the project has no official deadline, as the plan is the “phase” both the renovations and spending of student current students’ tuition over the next 3-5 years.

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